


The Consort

by HillaryLeonor



Category: Political RPF, Political RPF - US 20th c., Political RPF - US 21st c.
Genre: Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Alternate Universe - Medieval, Arranged Marriage, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-19
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-10-12 15:42:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 25,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17470361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HillaryLeonor/pseuds/HillaryLeonor
Summary: Having lost her father's position, Hillary chose to be wed to a man she had never met. She was intended to support her younger brother Hugh once he becomes King, but she is destined for far greater things.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Sorry I have not been able to update lately because life caught up to me. But do not fret. This fic is actually finished already and I will be posting daily updates. I was hesitant to post it at first but...screw it. Writing this was so much fun. This fic is written in Bill and Hillary's POV so I've put the necessary labels to let you know who's talking. 
> 
> So without further ado...The Consort!

_ Hillary _

My mother gave me this journal as a wedding present; normally, girls of my age and stature would receive a jewelry made from the finest glass, the purest gold and the most exquisite pearls. However, my father had been usurped out of his throne and our lands taken away, my mother couldn’t afford such tradition. Instead, she had this journal made for me. I remember the words she uttered when she gave me this journal: “One day, our family will regain what is rightfully ours, and you will lead us to our glory”.

I paid no mind to my Mother’s enigmatic words. Surely, she was simply delusional. As a lady, I was trained to support the leadership of my younger brother, Hugh, over our domain. But that didn’t come into fruition when the nobles, led by my Uncle Howard, turned against my father in a coup. Cowardly snakes. My Uncle Howard was cunning but vile. My siblings and I never really liked him, even when we were children.  He had three wives and had produced seven children. We never really knew his family, and truth be told, it was better that way.

Because of the coup, we were left in disgrace, and my parents are distraught. My plan of supporting my brother as a courtier and royal counsel was shattered.  Our futures have drastically changed. It is of utmost importance that we take our honor and domain back.

It is my dedication to that cause that made me decide to allow myself to be wed to the Prince of Arkansas, Prince William Jefferson. Charismatic and charming, he is seen by my father as a valuable ally to our cause. His father, King William II, has a deep hatred against my Uncle Howard. My uncle had wed his sister as his first wife and while she was pregnant with their second child, Uncle Howard was having a tryst with another woman who went on to become his second wife. King William had never forgiven Uncle Howard for his unfaithfulness. And so, my father seized this opportunity to forge an alliance with the Arkansans. I did not need much persuasion to be on his plan. I was willing to do anything to restore our family’s honor. I shall do my part in making sure that my father’s bloodline will regain the control over New York and our other domains.

I swear on my honor; the throne will be ours again.

_Hillary Diane Alexandra Victoria, Princess of New York, Duchess of Westchester, Countess of Cook_

xxx

_ Bill _

My dearest Claire,

I trust that this letter finds you well. My heart beats for you always, and every second that passes that I do not see your face, my love and longing for you grows.

My love, I hope I could say everything that I need to say in person, but time does not permit me. By the time you read this, I will have been married to Lady Hillary of New York. I am really sorry that it has come to this, but I was left with no choice. Please believe me when I say that I take no joy in doing this. My father has ordered me to marry Lady Hillary, whom I have never met. I tried to resist his wishes, but I cannot escape the will of my father. I had thought of fleeing with you, but my father will surely find us, and I do not want to endanger you.

No matter what my fate may be, my heart is only yours and nobody else's. Please believe me, my love. I love you more than anyone else. But my duty had robbed us of a life together, and I will forever weep on our love that wasn't meant to be.

I will miss you. I will miss your golden hair, your soft bosom, your heavenly voice. I will miss our chess games and our horseback rides in the woods. I will miss your touch, your smile, your presence. I will miss every single part of you, because nobody had made me this happy but you.

Even though I will marry someone else, always know that I am forever yours. I am yours until I draw my last breath.

My love always,

Billy

xxx

_ Hillary _

All my life, the prospect of marriage never occurred to me, as I was raised to support my brother in his reign. But I must admit, now that I am days before going into one, it fascinates me and confuses me at the same time. I am full of awe that men and women could make a vow that they would remain faithful to each other for the rest of their days, yet I am befuddled as to why many still take such vow when most of them are bound to break it. Take for example my Uncle Howard. He had taken his vows thrice and had broken it twice. If he could take the vow, break it and take another one again, it makes marriage vows meaningless.

And then there is the subject of arranged marriages. I am well aware that these are made to forge alliances. The power of such marriages lies on the assumption that the couple would remain true to their vows. However, more often than is not, arranged marriages break apart. Much more so than traditional ones.

That being said, I promise to myself that I will try to preserve my marriage with the Arkansan prince. Or at least, until my father reacquires his lost position.

Prince William, or Bill as he is called in his household, is a handsome man. He is the eldest son of King William II. He has younger half-brother named Roger, who was born to Bill's mother and one of King William's knights. Not many people knew about Roger, but Bill told me this on our first private meeting in their courtyard.

He was charming. Too charming for his own good, I think. I could tell that he isn't too happy with this arrangement. But to his credit, he didn't show any hint of disdain towards me. He was gallant as he was kind. But his simple gestures betray his feelings. My experienced eye did not miss these. And to tell the truth, I my heart goes out to him. I pity him for having to go through this so unwillingly.

There was one thing that really struck me in our first meeting was his confession. He told me that he was in love with someone, and he was planning to marry her before his father told him to marry me. That explained his unwillingness to participate in this. As skeptic as I was in the concept of romance and marriage, I felt sorry for him and for his lady. It was evident that he was in love with her. He was the first person I met who had real affections for someone. And while I know I am doing my duty, I could not help but feel terrible for him.

Right after our meeting, Bill took me for a stroll around their castle. He showed me to my chambers, to the kitchens, the stables and the banquet hall. But the place that caught my attention was the archives. Bill's family archives are bigger than ours. I was amazed at their vast collection of books and scriptures. It almost reminded me of home. If ever I felt lonely in these walls, I am sure to find a welcoming companion in their archives.

The week leading up to our wedding was truly frantic one. Guests had begun to arrive, and I was to meet every one of King William's vassals and their wives. My years as my father's emissary and diplomat have trained me for this, but nothing could have prepared me to be a future monarch's wife. The people of Arkansas are widely different from the people of New York. As soon as I was introduced as a courtier and advisor to my father, I was immediately met with raised eyebrows and horrified gasps. It was as if a princess like me was unheard of. The men then completely ignored me while the women pulled me into their circles. I tried to escort my future husband as he talked with the men, but I was detained by the women. Such a barbaric arrangement, and I am not sure I can stoop to such a position.

This did not go unnoticed to Bill, who was watching me the entire time. The night before our wedding, we headed out for a nighttime stroll in the gardens. He admitted that he did not like seeing me being confined with the women only. He told me he knew what I could do, and he wanted me to always be by his side. For the first time, I became optimistic of this marriage. I think I had found an ally. And what I appreciated in him is that he was a good listener, and he had confidence in my abilities. He told me that he is not expecting me to become like the other wives in Arkansas, and he will be asking for my counsel often. When I thought I would be alone in this unfamiliar kingdom, Bill made sure I felt right at home.

Before we parted, Bill kissed my hand and my forehead. I shuddered at his touch. I was used to men kissing my hand, but never in my forehead. I felt he was overstepping his bounds. But he will be my husband in a few hours. I should get used to this treatment.

xxx

_ Bill _

My dear friend Al,

I am sorry that you did not come to my wedding. There is no one any man wants on his side on his wedding more than his best friend. But do not fret, because I was well-served by my brother, Roger.

My wedding had been a festive one. It was attended by all of Father's vassals and emissaries from other kingdoms. Every man that I have met was there, even the merest of soldiers and the poorest of servants. There can be no doubt that every one of these people were there to celebrate.

However, I could not say the same for my wife. She, being a foreigner, was not warmly received by the people. Also, all of her father's vassals turned against them and pledged allegiance to her uncle, whom my Father hated very much. As you can surmise, that is why we were arranged to be wed. Howard is a common enemy. It is our common interest that he be deposed as quickly as possible. I myself do not like Howard very much and I believe he is a threat to our kingdom's interests. But with my wife's cunning mind and Father's indomitable army, I believe victory is within reach.

It is no question that while I am looking forward to deposing Howard, I am not happy to enter this marriage. I was heartbroken to let Claire go. I love her dearly, and still very much so. I am devastated that my dreams of growing old with her is not in the cards. I wish she would wait for me until I am finally free, but I do not want to trap her in my clutches. I only pray that she finds another man who will love her more than I do.

Now that I am married to the Princess, my Father is expecting that she bears a child soon. I wish he would give us time. I feel terrible for my wife. She is being hounded by rumors and questions left and right. There are even rumors that she is infertile, which I am sure is untrue. We are simply living under the pressure of producing a child, but we are working hard so that it will come to fruition.

I hope you can visit us soon so that you can finally meet Hillary. She is pleasant and kind, much to my surprise. She is very warm, despite what other people say. They are just not used to being with a sharp-witted female diplomat. I, however, am fascinated by her presence.

Please give my best wishes to Tipper and your children. I miss them all. If you come here with the girls, I will show them the mountain range behind the castle. It will be a very delightful adventure for all of us.

Godspeed,

Bill

xxx

_ Hillary _

The thing that baffles me most in a marriage is the unparalleled pressure on a newly-wed couple to produce a child. I understand that because of the nature of my marriage with Bill, the urgency to produce an heir is immense, but my goodness! I do not see the need to ask me every day if my cycle had already come. And those rumors that I am infertile! How horrible! They must have associated my mannish behavior with inability to produce a child. Such vile thoughts! My people never judged a woman by her capacity to bear a child! While I marvel at Arkansas' military capability, I am baffled by their backward philosophy.

My annoyance did not escape my husband's notice. He was very apologetic on behalf of his people. He told me that here in the South, women are expected to be obedient wives and bear many children. I do not be to be reminded of that. I became acquainted of that culture on my very first day in Arkansas. If there was another powerful kingdom that can support Father's campaign, I will have happily submitted myself to their rule. But alas, I am forced to stay in this regressive society in the South.

Despite my frustrations, my husband was a pleasant companion. He understood my position, that I am alone in this new, unfamiliar society, and he did everything to make me sure I am comfortable and cared for. Take for example, our wedding night. The laws of Arkansas dictate that the newly wedded couple should consummate their marriage otherwise it will be legally annulled. Members of the royal court were present in our wedding bed, though Bill and I were covered by a thin veil to give us a semblance of privacy.

I climbed our bed with a mixture of apprehension and unease in my chest. Bill asked me if I was afraid. I truthfully told him that I was anxious about our first act as husband and wife.

"Do not be afraid," I recalled him saying. "Not with me."

His voice was soft and tender, and it gave me comfort. Like a warm blanket in the middle of a storm.

He gently pushed me against the bed and slowly removed my nightgown. Despite his assurances, I still felt vulnerable. How could I not? There were several pairs of eyes that were watching our every move. As if he read my mind, Bill interrupted my thoughts with a kiss.

At first, I did not know what was happening. I was startled. I thought he was strangling me with his lips, but I eventually caught on. His lips were warm and soft, and his kiss was tender. He did not press. He did not force. He waited for me to catch on and when I did, I let his tongue inside my mouth. He was leading me, but he made sure that I was comfortable before he went further. Slowly, I began to enjoy his kisses, which I never thought I would.

In time, my hesitation vanished, only to be replaced by a warm feeling in my stomach. If Bill had done this before, his experience showed. He knew how find his way in a woman's body, even more than I do. His deft, experienced fingers worshiped my breasts. As he worked on my body, I closed my eyes and let myself enjoy this.

The more Bill played with my body, the more I could feel his hardness in my belly. He was hard as a rock. From what I could feel, I was suddenly apprehensive. I wasn’t looking at him, but I knew he was huge. I didn’t know anyone could have a member of that size. I was afraid that he wouldn’t fit, or if he managed to fit himself inside me, I would break.

“Wait,” I said, I opened my eyes and pushed him. “I don’t think I can do this.”

He looked at me, confused. “Why not?”

“I do not think I can take you in.”

He looked down at himself and chuckled, “I’ll take care of it. Do not worry, my beautiful wife. I am going to be gentle, but I cannot promise you that it will not hurt. But I will try my best to make you comfortable.”

I felt my cheeks burn when he said beautiful wife. I know I am sharp and dominant, but beautiful was never used to described me before. If this was his way to calm me down, it was working.

Bill looked at me to ask for my permission to proceed. Pulling up my courage, I nodded. I think I was prepared for the most intimate act. And Bill had just assured me, he would be gentle, and given what I had seen from him, I think I could trust him. 

He positioned himself between my legs and pushed himself inside me. It hurt. I hurt a lot more than I had ever thought it would, a sudden unpleasant stretching deep within me. I felt something was torn. I gasped and squirmed, fighting my tears as I sought anyway to make this better. I never thought this was going to hurt as much. All of this had been so good until he went inside me.

I was aware of Bill whispering in my ear, “I’m sorry”. I struggled to look at him, rather than squeezing my eyes to shut the pain. “I’m so sorry, Hillary,” I heard him say again. “But please, breathe. Let go, or this will only hurt you no matter what I do.”

I didn’t know what to do, but he was probably right, so I calmed myself down and let myself float on the bed. The pain was still there, but once I began to let go, the pain ebbed.

Bill encouraged me as I did what he said, and I began to regain my confidence. His breath was hot against the lobe of my ear. His husky voice did something in me. It made my muscles twitch. I didn’t know it could do that, but it felt good. Almost a tickling sensation, and it numbed the pain a little.

My husband began to rock his hips gently. It hurt a little, but not as much as when he first entered my depths. That had been shockingly painful. This was merely unpleasant.

Bill coupled his thrusts with kisses along my jawline. It was easier to forget the pain when he was kissing me like that. He seemed to notice that I was responding, and so he carried on. He kissed other parts of my body too, and for some reason, I let out a soft moan, a sound I never heard myself give. And all the while, despite a rough start, Bill keeping the rhythm, pressing himself against me. In and out. In and out.

After a while, I had noticed that Bill had increased his pace. The pain was gone, and I began to feel something stir inside me. Something warm and pleasurable. Something good. I wanted more. I wanted to see where it would lead me. I wanted to push the limits on how much pleasure I could take. I was about to beg Bill to give me more when he shuddered over me and thrust his hips against mine several times. I liked the rough sensation that it brought. I liked the increased pleasure. But all of a sudden, he pulled out, and I was left confused.

I opened my eyes again, and I found my husband panting on my side. He was drenched with sweat, and his member lay flaccid in his stomach. Only then that I realized what had just happened: Bill had climaxed already.

For the first time in my life, I had finally experienced the touch of the opposite sex. Truth be told, all the stories I have heard regarding sex are simply romanticized and embellished. An earth-shattering sex was simply a myth told by poets to make people believe the joys of romantic love.

But still, my husband was very kind. After the observers have ascertained that we have consummated the marriage, he took time to clean me. He wiped the blood off my sex and help me into my nightgown. Once everybody was gone, he escorted me to my chambers, where he kissed me on my lips again. This time, he was much slower and more languid. I thought it was a sweet gesture from him, and I appreciated it. When he walked back to his own chambers, I took the time to appreciate him.

This marriage is working more splendidly than I thought it would. I just hope we can keep up with the pressures of a married life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, thank you so much for all the kudos and comments! You make this sleep-deprived girl happy!
> 
> Thank you to grahamnortonrocks for being a wonderful beta. You rock!

_ Hillary _

Dearest Mother,

Thank you so much for sending Huma to me. I miss ~~ed~~ my old life in New York and Huma made feel right at home. Thanks to her, I am no longer alone in the South (though my husband never fails to make me feel I am welcome). Words could not express how happy I am to have her with me.

Bill and I left the castle of Little Rock to reside in his estate in Fayetteville. The estate is farther away from his father's residence than would be convenient, but we chose the place because we want to build our family away from the chatter and pressure. Before Father and King William could take steps to reclaim our lands, Bill and I would like to take the time off to ourselves.

The estate is beautiful. Our residence is surrounded by a forest and there is a large lake at the backyard where we can swim. There is also a lot of game around the castle, and so every weekend, Bill and I go out and hunt. The women around me do not approve of me going out to hunt game, but my husband certainly approves. He enjoys my company every time we venture into the forest. Just last week, I caught a large stag. I was so proud of myself, and Bill was too!

Despite the colorful picture of our marriage, we have a few stumbling blocks once in a while. Bill admits he misses his beloved, and I simply let him be. I completely understand what he feels right now. He is as alone as I am. We were put into this arrangement, and we need some time to adjust. I hope there is something I can do, but at the end of the day, Bill needs to pull himself together. I will be the partner that he needs, but I cannot see this marriage through without him. And as he had repeatedly told me, he remains committed to this.

I know you are excited to hear some news about your future grandchild. I wish I could deliver glad tidings right now, but Bill and I are still working to make me pregnant. I would love to give you a grandchild, but the people around me are very annoying and they test my temper. They never tire of asking me if I am already pregnant. They will not be satisfied until the day I say yes. If only just to shut them up, I do want to be pregnant right now.

Please give Father, Hughie and Tony my love. Don't worry about me. I am fine and doing splendidly here in Arkansas. Though I do miss being with Father and meeting with his vassals.

I hope you are all doing well. Please, write to me soon! I miss you!

Your loving daughter,

Hillary

xxx

_ Bill _

My dear brother,

I am ever thankful that you stood in my wedding as my best man. You gladly took the mantle when Al could not make it, and I am grateful for your unconditional support.

Married life is very different from our carefree lives, dear brother. No more nightly excursions in the woods, no more drinking until dawn, no more strumming and singing until our voices are hoarse. It's as if I suddenly grew up and I was thrust into a myriad of responsibilities. Before, I only had myself to think about. Now, I have my wife to worry about too. And in a couple of months, I hope to have a child to rear. Life is less easy when you're married, brother, so I say to you: remain a bachelor for as long as you can!

Despite the responsibilities though, my wife and I are enjoying the life here in Fayetteville. You can come visit us! We would love to have your company. Or better yet, move in here with us! I am sure you can find a local girl in here that you will fancy. Arkansas has no shortage of beautiful girls. And being a handsome young man, you will have a lady in your arms in no time.

Despite how I am enjoying the first few months of my married life right now, I still miss Claire and often think of her. And I always wonder if she still thinks of me too. Does she still think of me before she sleeps? Does she even go to our favorite places because she misses me? Alas, I will never know. I know I told her that it would be best for her to forget me and move on because we will never be together, but a selfish part of me still wishes that she doesn't. I hate the mere thought of another man holding her, kissing her, loving her. I feel that everything of her is mine, and everything mine is hers. Despite having made love to my wife several times, she still feels foreign to me. It's not that she doesn’t satisfy me; she does, but the fact is, she is not Claire. Only Claire has my heart. Only Claire can make me truly happy, and that is the truth.

Despite my overwhelming love for Claire, I cannot help but feel genuinely concerned for Hillary. She feels very much lost in Arkansas. She tries her best to fit in with the ladies, but her overwhelming confidence and wits do not make her an ideal wife in the eyes of the Arkansans. Every time she is with me, people barely hide their disdain or befuddlement over her. I wish they would stop doing that. As I’ve come to discover, Hillary is no ordinary princess. She has the strength, cunning and wisdom of a King. I’m secretly grateful that she has wedded me. Arkansas could not afford an enemy like her. If her father manages to regain his lost position, I will make sure that we are on her good side. Thought from the outside, it doesn’t seem like she wields so much influence over her father and brother, she does. I am grateful that because of her father’s downfall, we have made an ally out of her. Otherwise, I will not be able to sleep at night knowing Hillary can usurp what we have.

I hope I will hear from you soon, brother. You still owe me another round of merriment after you lost our bet.

Always yours,

Bill

xxx

_ Hillary _

I am glad to be going back to Fayetteville. I don’t think I can stand Little Rock anymore.

Bill and I were invited to King William’s birthday celebration. We were eager to go, as Bill missed him dearly and he is very gracious to me. What I dreaded the most were the judging glares of the ladies and wives of the court. However, I am getting used to the chatter. In time, I had learned to ignore the mindless murmuring of everyone around me. All of them seemed to have a disdain on me, with the exception of Lady Diane Blair and Mary, daughter of Lord Steenburgen.

At the king’s birthday reception, Bill was to accompany his father and I was to be with Queen Virginia, his mother. I could only groan my dissatisfaction. Like the other Arkansans, Queen Virginia seemed to be disapproving of me as Bill’s wife. If she only knew how much in agreement we are, albeit for completely different reasons. She did not like me as his wife, and I did not like to be married in the first place. But of course, for the sake of my father’s comeback, I made this sacrifice. And truth be told, if I were to choose a husband for myself, I wouldn’t have chosen his son either.

The night of the reception, Queen Virginia was in her usual cheery yet judgmental self. Of course, I remained calm and polite despite the disapproving glares and remarks from her. I trusted in my excellent diplomatic skills to carry me through. However, that night, I was about to find out what the limit to my temper was.

Queen Virginia and I were cordially greeting guests. Most of them were also in attendance in my wedding, and remembering their names wasn’t a burden to me. To my relief, they were actually friendlier to me than when I first met them. When my eyes glanced to the side, I saw Queen Virginia almost rolled hers. I could tell that she didn’t like that the people were warming up to me, or maybe I was stealing her thunder. I pulled every ounce of restraint in me not to throw a nasty remark. And I am glad to say that I was successful.

And as the night deepened, I actually began to enjoy the banquet. Diane and Mary were in attendance and they were delightful as usual. They were the only women in Arkansas who really cared for my well-being, except for Huma, Diane and Mary, like the others, were quite curious about my pregnancy. But unlike the other folks, they were genuinely excited for me to become a mother.

Diane, Mary and I were in the middle of a conversation when I was gently interrupted. Diane pointed to a woman who was getting her wine. She was tall, her hair was long, smooth and golden, like the ears of wheat. Her hips were, in the words of Arkansan folks, perfect for childbearing. Her gown, which tightly hugged her body, showed her beautiful curves. I thought the woman was beautiful.

I felt a sour taste in my mouth when Diane told me that the woman is Claire, Bill’s beloved.

I pushed my budding jealousy aside and told the ladies that I thought Claire was beautiful. Both Mary and Diane were stunned that I was able to complement the woman who was a threat to my marriage. I reasoned that I saw no reason for me to feel threatened. As long as Bill remained committed to our marriage, I saw no reason to feel upset. However, I wasn’t inclined to speak to her or to befriend her. I didn’t want to sow seeds of doubt in our marriage, because I intend to see this alliance through.

However, my plan to stay out of the crosshairs was shattered when Queen Virginia called me. To my annoyance, she was speaking with Claire.

Queen Virginia introduced me to Lady Claire, who was the daughter of the Earl of Hot Springs, the county where Bill grew up. They were childhood friends, and they grew up together. They were very close friends. I need not be told that Bill and Claire were lovers, but Queen Virginia was only too happy to repeat that fact. Lady Claire simply smiled. I could not sense whether she was enjoying this as much as Queen Virginia, or if she was in agony just like me.

Claire bowed to me, as deference to a princess. I too gave her the proper respects. To my relief, Claire excused herself because she was going to look for her mother. Queen Virginia dismissed her. I too excused myself, but instead of dismissing me right away, she let out a litany of things that she admired about Claire, as if to quietly tell me that she would have wanted her to be Bill’s wife rather than me. I am not a jealous woman, but I hated to be told that someone was better than me, especially someone whose only asset is her face. After an eternity of the Queen’s poetics, I was finally excused and left for Mary and Diane. 

Mary and Diane were such sweethearts. They saw the entire thing and they too disapproved of what Queen Virginia did. In fact, they were disgusted by her subtle shaming of me. I tried not to let the incident affect me, but I was glad that Mary and Diane were here to comfort me.

Night turned into midnight, and the guests began to depart home. I too was getting a little exhausted after talking to so many guests. I was ready to turn myself in, so I looked for my husband to bid him goodnight.

I found him the courtyard, and to my surprise and dismay, he was sitting on the fountains next to Claire. They were seated fairly close to each other. If I hadn’t come to see my husband, I was sure something else could have happened.

This time, I did not bother to hide my anger. This, coupled with my frustrations that I kept to myself all night, was enough for me to explode in rage. 

Bill and Claire both jumped when they noticed that I was there. For the first time, I saw my husband’s face darken in panic. He shielded Claire with his body. His move further aggravated me.

Bill tried to explain what was happening, but there was no need to. My eyes were witnesses to what was happening, and I trusted my eyes more than my husband’s tongue. I knew what his tongue was capable of, and I know better than to let him capture me under his spell, so when he came to me, I immediately let him know my feelings through a slap on his face.

“I feel filthy,” I seethed, “I feel filthy because I married a whore.”

I left the courtyards ignoring Bill’s pleads and Claire’s sobs. My white-hot rage was uncontrollable. I felt humiliated because I could not keep my husband in line. He can love and sing praises of that woman for all his live for all I care, but I did not throw away everything I had just to have my future ruined by a man who uses his cock to more than he uses his brain. I will dismember that cock if I have to. 

I retired to my chambers with my heart pounding with rage. He was supposed to climb into my bed that night because he hadn’t touched me since we journeyed from Fayetteville to Little Rock. He already had my touch, and that touch would sting his face for days. 

The following morning, Bill told me at breakfast that we would be staying in Little Rock to settle some matters with the Count of Pulaski. I suddenly felt faint, knowing that I would stay in that horrible place longer. I told Bill that I would be leaving for Fayetteville immediately. I wasn’t asking for his permission. I was simply informing him. Whether or not he approved, I would still make my journey.

But it turned out, I didn’t need his explicit disapproval for me to stay in Little Rock. The next morning, I fell ill, and I was restrained to my bed for several days. He didn’t see me during the times I was ill, and I was grateful for it. I felt that whatever ailment that ills my body would only worsen if he were to be in my proximity.

Thankfully, I was able to leave Little Rock after a week. I had Huma with me, and Bill, as he mentioned before, was left with his Father. When I left the Clinton castle, my chest suddenly relaxed. I felt like I could breathe again. No husband to take command over me.

If I was lucky, maybe he would die when I’m gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *insert sunglasses emoji*

_Bill_  

My dearest wife, 

As I write this letter, I feel humbled because I still have not earned your forgiveness and yet I will break your confidence again, because I will need to stay much longer here in Little Rock.  

I know that I should be kneeling before you to ask for your forgiveness and favor, and I will do that once I come home, but please, let me explain everything here at a distance, because when I see your eyes, my guilt only weighs heavier. 

That night, at Father's banquet, I was surprised to see Claire. I did not think she would accompany her father, as the trip from her home to mine was quite long and dangerous. So when I saw her, I decided to take the opportunity to finally turn the page with her.  

Our meeting was amicable and cathartic. I admit that we were both hurting but we both knew that learning to let each other go was the right decision. We have accepted that we will never be together, despite the objection of our hearts. We were crying. It was painful to let the love of your life go. I do not know much about you and your experiences, but if you have truly loved someone before, you will understand me.  

And so, when you found us, we were both horrified, because we were so ready to make a fresh start, but we were thrown back to our dilemma. And I didn't want you to think that I was taking your hardships for granted. No. I know what you had to give up to be in this marriage, and as I promised your Father, I will keep my end of the covenant. I will not endanger this marriage because of my foolishness.  

I beg you, Hillary, to please forgive me. I definitely meant no harm to you, and I certainly did not want to disrespect you. You are the princess of New York, and you embody the spirit of a real New Yorker.

I hope I have cleared my name. I do miss our breakfast together and our walks in the garden and reading in the library. As I find out the hard way, my life is not as exciting without you. 

With you always,  

Bill 

 xxx

_Hillary_

Dear Diane,

Thank you for writing to me back so soon. You have been a comfort to me these past few months. I may be surrounded my many people, but I feel so alone. There is no one I could really talk to but you.

I have just recovered from an illness. My healers say that I could be pregnant, but when I had my cycle this month, all was done. For a while, I had a flickering hope that I could finally relieve the pressure of producing an heir, but alas, I was not so fortunate. This was a reminder that I should take care of myself and work harder with Bill to bring a son or a daughter into this world.

Bill recently came back from Little Rock. The first thing he did was to come to my bedchambers to apologize. He explained to me that he was really just ending things with Claire, just as he said in his letter. He told me that he should have confided in me first before taking action. The incident in Little Rock had taught him that he should trust me more. To tell you the truth, I was touched by his apology. I felt that he indeed valued my opinion. And because he had really shown remorse, I let him touch me that night.

The next day, I woke up surrounded by lilies and roses. I was confused. One of our maids told me that Bill had ordered them to collect flowers and beautify my chamber. I was stunned. He was really going out of his way to let me know how sorry he was. I felt like a blushing bride, but I did not let anyone know that, especially Bill. Ever since he returned to Little Rock, we have become close as ever.

Bill confided in me that he was worried about his Father going to Afghanistan to broker the peace. This came as a surprise to me. King William had volunteered himself to be an envoy to settle the dispute between their King and the rebels. I too was worried about my father-in-law. To broker peace in the region is the right thing to do, but the whole situation is precarious to say the least. My father had tried built the foundations of long-lasting peace in the region too, but his efforts ultimately crumbled when Iran interfered with the negotiations, and the ousted Shah fled to Europe where he was protected by the European monarchs. As retaliation, the Iranians assassinated the Duke of Normandy. And I fear that my father-in-law might have the same fate.

My mother wrote to me saying that my brother Tony decided to join the clergy. I am happy that he has found his calling, though to be honest, I am looking to see little ones running around our castle. Oh well. It is up to Hughie now to produce grandchildren who will wear our Father's crown.

I miss you so, my dear friend. You are special to me and I cherish the friendship that we have. Thank God you were such a loudmouth during my wedding otherwise I would not have seen how wonderful you are.

Always your friend,

Hillary

xxx

_Bill_

Beloved Father,

I hope you are doing well in your mission to resolve the conflict in Afghanistan. Please know that I am praying and rooting for you every day, because your success will mean long-lasting peace and prosperity in the region.

My decision to move back to Little Rock was not met with enthusiasm by my wife but she knows that I must lead the kingdom in your absence. I appreciated that she understood my role. If Claire was in my wife’s shoes, she would have been mad at me for leaving her alone for so long.

Despite her disapproval, Hillary has been a comfort to me. Her companionship was precisely what I needed at the moment. Her wisdom was beyond what I had expected of her. It's as if you were here by my side, guiding me. She is wise beyond her years, sometimes she behaves as if she has been dealing with this all her life. 

Remember when you told me how Hillary could be easily seen as cold and distant, yet she is warm and gracious up close? I think I am finally beginning to see that side of hers. Oftentimes, she is tough, brilliant and wise. But when unguarded, she's caring, funny and a joy to be with. There is something in her that people are prone to miss, but when you see it, you can't get enough of her. I am humbled to say that your description of Hillary is correct. She is a woman like no other. 

That is not to say that we do not have differences, and I am ashamed to say that most of them are faults of mine. The biggest of our differences came during the banquet in honor of your birthday. Hillary saw Claire and me talking, and she thought I was having a tryst with Claire. I should have told Hillary about my plans. I have no intention of destroying our union, as the future of our two kingdoms rests on the success of this relationship. Hillarywas embarrassed by my actions, and I lived in regret for having humiliated her with the woman that could very well destroy everything Hillary and I had built.

I am slowly beginning to learn how to be happy in my married life, despite the objections of my heart. Hillary satisfies me like no other woman can, which has surprised me immensely. However, there is still a part of me that yearns for Claire, and I feel guilty for still thinking of her despite Hillary’s loyalty to me.

I pray that you’ll safely return to us, Father. We miss you so, especially Mother. I hope I hear from you soon.

Your loving son,

Bill

xxx

_Hillary_

I don’t know what had happened, but I noticed something peculiar with my husband ever since we came to Little Rock.

After he had apologized for his secret meeting with Claire, things begun to become better for me and Bill. This was a welcome development for us. I had been looking forward to establishing a good relationship with Bill. As for Father’s campaign, Bill told me that the vassals all over Little Rock support my Father, and in a few months’ time, we would be reclaiming New York back.

But despite our very harmonious relationship, Bill has gone out of his way to support me and to make me feel valued. Just the other week, he gave me a very fine Turkoman, and it wasn’t even my birthday. Or that time that he introduced me to his vassals as the future Queen of Arkansas and New York. Preposterous, but I was flattered.

But the most peculiar incident happened two months ago.

One night, after we had our supper, Bill and I were having our usual talk in the halls of the castles. This a ritual of ours before we go each other’s bedchambers, or before he climbs to mine. Every time we were in the same castle, we made sure that we had this conversation, no matter how silly or insignificant it was.

During one of our talks, I complained that one of our kitchen maids was too loud. He frowned and asked me what I meant. I told him that I heard her coupling with the stable boy in the wine cellar when I walked past it. He chuckled, and he assured me that he would speak to both the kitchen maid and the stable boy. I appreciated that he was quick to attend to my needs and complaints, but it wasn’t the end of my frustration.

“Why?” he asked.

I told him that I was annoyed to women who scream during sex. I didn’t get why they had to be so loud. If their screams were meant to please the men, then it was a strange way of doing so.

He stared at me with a pained expression on his face and asked me if I ever felt any urge to scream during sex.

I said of course not.

He looked a little bit hurt and ashamed, and I didn’t understand why. I apologized if I had offended him in anyway, but he said it wasn’t my fault. He quickly bid me goodbye and told me that he would be in my bedchamber shortly.

As he promised, he turned up in my bedchamber. I started to remove my nightgown but he stopped me before I could do so. I was left confused.

“I want to try something new,” he said.

I was unsure what to make of it, but I followed his whims anyway. He gently pushed me on to the bed, fully clothed, and stared at me for a good five minutes. I didn’t know what to do, so I simply stared at him back. I noticed that his eyes were darker than usual, and his breathing was labored. I wondered if he drunk wine before he came here, but his breath did not smell like alcohol.

Then, he finally kissed me. He kissed me deeper and more desperately than I could remember. There was urgency in his kiss that I only thought was mythical. While I was kissing back, I felt something stir in my belly and in my center. I felt excited. Excited for something. What it was, I didn’t know yet.

Bill then began to remove my clothes. Every inch of my skin that was exposed was bathed with his kisses. It felt a little strange having someone kiss me in places other than my mouth, hand, forehead or cheek, but I came to realize later on that it felt good. The stirring in me did not go away, but grew, like a small fire being fed with dried wood. 

I realized that his kisses were going south. I didn’t know where he was going with this, but the drunkenness of my mind overruled my rationality. I felt really, really good. I decided to trust him on this and closed my eyes in pleasure.

I felt his mouth hovering dangerously close to my sex. I looked from above to see if he was going to stop there, but to my surprise and delight, he didn’t. The closer he was to my sex, the better I felt. My heart was beating twice as fast, and my sex was pulsing even harder.

Bill gave one long swipe at my opening with his tongue, and I thought I could feel the earth crumble beneath me. I never felt something so intense yet so pleasurable in my life. I was so overwhelmed that I moaned quite loudly. I was reminded of the loud kitchen maid I’d heard. I felt a little embarrassed, like a disgraced woman, so I quickly pulled the sheets over my naked body.

Bill was quick to notice my reaction. He held me close and kissed me again on the lips. I shuddered a little, knowing that the liquids from my sex were on his mouth, and now in mine as well.

“Hillary,” he said, his voice deeper than anything I have heard from him, “do not be ashamed. It’s supposed to be this way.”

“What? Loud and undignified?” I said, still disgusted at myself.

“No. Pleasurable,” he said. “And your moans tell me that you are enjoying this, because I want you to. I want to show you the real pleasures of sex.”

I was confused as to what he meant by the pleasures of sex. Could I have be wrong about sex for years?

He kissed me in the forehead again and he returned to my slit. He gave me another lick, and to my bewilderment, a stronger wave of pleasure engulfed my body.  My stomach twisted in knots, but I wasn’t in pain. I couldn’t explain this mixture of pain and pleasure, but I was craving for it, whatever it was.  

I felt myself begging for him to continue what he was doing. It felt good. It felt so good that I thought it was forbidden, and only heaven could over such pleasure.

If this was heaven, I wouldn’t mind dying.

I was pulled back from my thoughts when I felt Bill’s finger brush against my entrance. For a moment, I thought he was going to enter into my depths, but to my surprise pushed not his member, but his middle finger. I felt him curl his finger, and just when I thought I had felt the most wonderful pleasure, I realized that I was wrong. Pleasure, stronger than ever before, had taken over me.

He thrusted his fingers right into me, mirroring his member’s motions whenever he was touching me. And at the same time, his tongue was working on my folds and on my nub. I was thrusting back at him. As good as I had already felt, I wanted more. I never imagined that I would be this desperate for something, yet there I was, begging him to give me more of this explicit pleasure, as if I would die if he refused.

And then all of a sudden, I felt what I had been longing for without knowing it. I had never experienced anything like this, this insane, all-encompassing pleasure that seemed to only grow and never diminish. I wanted more, so much more of this pleasure, and the man who was giving it to me. And in an instant, I fell over a ledge. A blinding white light flashed behind my eyes, and I screamed louder than I ever had. My entire body shook, unable to take this immense pleasure. I was overwhelmed by the feeling, but once I settled down, I was happy and content.

When my breathing had returned to normal, I noticed that Bill was more than ready to pound me, so I grabbed his hardness and stroked it. However, he removed my hand from himself, and instead kissed me on the cheek and on the forehead. He told me that I had already satisfied him. I was confused. He clearly was not satisfied yet, but he got up and dressed himself. He bid me goodnight, looking more content than I’ve ever seen him.

I was left in my bed, confused. I had the most exquisite pleasure, yet he seemed happier than I was.

Men say that women are complicated things. I could not have disagreed more.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this chapter. *wink* The real drama begins on thr next chapter ^_^


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DRAMAAAAAAAAAA

_Bill_

  
Al,

You’re right. Something is troubling me, but it is not what you think it is.

I have found out recently that my wife does not finish whenever we become intimate, and that weighed heavily in my conscience. It might be that my manly pride that was slighted when I became aware of this, but I felt guilty that she was not enjoying our coupling while I have never felt more alive whenever I take her to bed. As much I hate to admit it, Hillary is a better sexual partner than Claire.

I only became aware of Hillary’s experience with me when she complained to me that she heard our kitchen maid be intimate with our stable boy. She was disgusted at how loud she was and thought that it was just a pretense to impress the boy. That prompted me to ask her if she had any urge to scream or even moan when we were intimate. She strongly said no, and that single word told me everything I needed to know. I was ashamed and humiliated. What kind of a husband leaves his wife unsatisfied?

And so that night, I climbed up to her bed, determined to do what I should have done on our wedding bed. I pleasured her and I was successful. I had never felt so accomplished in my life. I felt so proud of myself that I did not mind walking away from her with a raging erection. I did not know what had gotten into me that night, but I refused sex! And what was stranger was that even though I was clearly aching to get a release, her orgasm was more than tenfold to me. No climax could have equated my sense of fulfillment when I watched her cry and moan in pleasure.

Why am I thinking such things? Have I gone mad?

And it doesn’t end there. I was so delighted in pleasuring her that I am now climbing to her bed every day. After that fateful night, I had contented myself in seeing her finish, but the more I see her get lost in her lust, the more I wanted her. Until one day, I finally succumbed to my desires. She was had this wanton look when she begged me to take her, and because I couldn’t bring myself to deny her, I did. And for the first time in our marriage, my heart was beating for the woman in front of me.

I wanted to follow the voice of my heart, but I couldn’t. Because of Claire.

Though we are no longer together, I promised her that she will be the only woman I will ever love. But now, I find myself falling for the woman who is the reason why Claire and I separated and whom I was forced to marry. I could not help it, Al. I tried to resist it, but I couldn’t. She was pulling her towards her, and I was too weak to fight her.

I need your wisdom, my dear friend. My father would say that I should follow my heart, but what if my heart itself is confused? I want to be the husband that Hillary truly deserves, but I don't want to betray Claire either.

I am so lost. Please, help me.

Bill

xxx

 

_Hillary_

  
My husband is truly an enigma. I really do not know what is going on with his mind these days.

A few weeks ago, he was very kind and gracious to me. We were intimate every day and he made sure that I was satisfied. I was grateful for the attention that he was giving me. He was truly making me feel special. Despite being a thousand miles away from New York, I truly felt I made a home here in Arkansas with Bill.

But suddenly, he became distant and withdrawn. He hasn't been to our nightly conversations nor has he climbed to my bedchamber as often as he usually did. I wondered what had happened to him, so I tried to inquire him about it. He adamantly refused to give me an answer. He said it had nothing to do with me and he was solely to blame for it. I insisted that we confront this together, but he maintained that he needed to figure it out on his own.

I tried to gather as much as I could. I tried to talk to Roger, but he said that Bill made him promise not to tell me anything, until at least he sorted this out.

I wondered if this had something to do with his father, so I asked my Father if King William was in some sort of trouble in Afghanistan. From what he had heard, King William was welcomed by the rebels and the lords alike, though he had some difficulty reaching a compromise between the two parties. It is understandable that Bill would worry about his Father, but it does not justify his distance from me, physically and emotionally. So, what is it?

After some time, I figured out that there is only one thing that Bill would keep from me: Claire.

Bill had promised me to trust me more, especially with affairs concerning Claire. And I first thought that he was breaking his vow to me. But then I later realized that Bill had told me that he needed to sort this out before he would confide it to me. I was a little hurt that he did not let in into his worries at first, but I trust him that he would stay true to his word.

Despite my decision to wait for the right time when he would let me in into his troubles, I cannot help but think that my husband is struggling to keep this marriage together. After all, he had confessed to me that he loved Claire dearly, and I respect that, just as he has respected my request not to do destroy our relationship. I felt that something had shifted in me since he had told me that. Before, I was not bothered at the fact that my husband would rather have someone in my place, but now, it did, but just a little. Perhaps I was just accustomed to being his wife and the center of his attention, and I was so used to the role that I could not imagine someone else fulfilling it.

I should really stop worrying about this, even though I couldn’t help myself doing so. The uncertainty has taken a toll on me. I have been ill for weeks. I am easily fatigued, and I would feel faint despite not having done much. Oftentimes I would throw up after my meals. I lost weight because of this, and I thought Bill must have not desired me because my body looked terrible.

I wish I could go back home in New York, at least for a while, but I couldn’t leave Bill. I just couldn’t.

xxx

 

_Dorothy_

  
My dearest daughter,

Child, I know you and Bill are going through tough times. I debated whether I should tell you this, but I felt that I have the obligation to tell you, no matter how heartbreaking it is.

Recently, your father had suddenly fainted and lost consciousness. We thought that he was simply fatigued, but the doctors told us that he had suffered a massive bleeding in his brain, which had affected his mobility. He had survived the hemorrhage, but he was permanently paralyzed, and his speech had suffered too.

Because of his condition, he could not lead the campaign to take back New York from your uncle. So instead, your brother Hugh will go to Arkansas to mobilize the troops before the first siege in Albany. As a mother and a wife, I am so disheartened to see your father suffer and your brother to risk his life to take back what is ours. As a daughter and sister, I am sure you understand my position.

Despite the circumstance, please do not let our troubles distract you. I am telling you this just so you know, but your prayers are all we need. Do not worry about us. With God’s grace, we will be alright.

I love you always, my dear Hillary. I hope you and Bill will reconcile soon.

Love,

Mother

xxx

_Bill_

  
The more I shut my wife out of the troubles, the heavier my guilt weighs on my conscience. And yet, I could not let her in my personal conflict. I could and should not let her worry about my past. Normally, I would confide about her regarding this and assure her that everything would be fine. However, I myself cannot say if everything would be fine, and always the caring person that she is, she would definitely spare a lot of thoughts for me, and I didn’t want that.

My decision to keep my troubles to myself had taken its toll on her. I noticed that she had lost weight and she is always fatigued. It didn’t help that she had received news about her father suffering a bleeding on his brain. When Hillary read her mother’s letter, she immediately lost consciousness. I was beside her when that happened. We were in the gardens; she was sitting near the fountain, reading, while I took my afternoon stroll. I saw that she looked distressed, but I let her be. But when she fainted, I rushed to her side and tried to wake her up. She wouldn’t respond to me, and at that moment, I was terrified.

I immediately carried her to her bed and screamed at our servants to call for a doctor. My heart was pounding in distress. Our nurse did what she could do to revive Hillary, but to no avail. Thankfully, the doctor arrived fairly quickly. I stayed on her side, holding her limp hand and praying to God that she be alright. When the doctor pulled her dress, we all gasped. There was blood everywhere under her skirt. I couldn’t understand what was happening, but I was frightened. I was frightened that I would lose her. For the first time in my life, I was scared, and my fears were enough to bring out the tears in my eyes. While the doctor did his job, I remained by her side, whispering in her ears, pleading that she come back to me.

The doctor was able to save Hillary’s life, but at a terrible price. He told me, when Hillary was finally sleeping, that the bleeding in her skirt came from her womb, and he was certain that Hillary had suffered a miscarriage. Right then and there, my whole world collapsed. My wife was pregnant, and I didn’t know it because I was too focused on pushing her away. I could have protected her and our child, but I was too busy wallowing in my own thoughts that I had forgotten my responsibility to her and to our future family. My reason for shutting her out was to protect her, but in the process, I failed. I am a terrible husband to her. Nothing can ever diminish that.

Hillary had worked so hard to keep our marriage intact. And I have destroyed all of her efforts. She does not deserve me, nor do our unborn child.

This is the first test of our marriage, and I have failed her terribly.

xxx

 

_Hillary_

  
I don't know if I ever wanted to leave my bedchamber again. There is nothing for me out there. I have always been ridiculed in Arkansas for my supposed inability to have a child. Apparently, that is true. What kind of woman loses her child before she knows she's pregnant? My mother didn't lose her children. My mother-in-law didn't either. It is only me who did. I was so engrossed over regaining my father's lost position that I had not paid attention to the duties of a traditional wife. Maybe this was a lesson for me that I should know my place, especially in a society like in Arkansas.

Ever since I found out about the miscarriage, I had lost interest in the internal affairs of my husband's kingdom. I left my bedchamber to be the lady of the house, accepting his guests and making sure that they are comfortable. I needed the simple life right now. I don't want to insert myself into politics. It's too exhausting for me, and frankly, it's stupid.

My husband, who has troubles of his own, is doing his best to make me comfortable. Every day, it was him who bathed me during the morning instead of my maids. He insisted doing the chore despite my refusals. He can't do that! He's the crown prince! It is beneath his dignity to wash his wife's body, to see my dirt and blemishes. I always crumble in shame whenever he scrubs my skin. He should only see me at my best. He is my husband, my lord and master, and I should serve him, not the other way around!

This routine continued. He would come to my bed and wake me up and bathe me. But we did not talk. He was so focused on his task. He was gentle to me, like I was a delicate flower, but he remained silent, and I couldn't stand it. It was very unlike him. I felt it was a different Bill who was washing me.

Finally, during one my baths, I finally pulled the courage to inquire Bill about his troubles again.

He didn't answer right away. His hands kept washing my dirty skin, but I noticed that his thoughts were deep. He seemed conflicted. His eyes were fixed on the water.

For a second, I thought he was going to leave me, but he sat on the edge of my tub. He was so submerged in his thoughts that he held my hand and laces his fingers with mine.

He then finally confessed what had been troubling him. As I suspected, it had something to do with Claire. He promised Claire that he would love only her and her alone. He admitted that he was not being faithful to his promise. I asked him to elaborate, but he told me he could not answer it yet. But he would, soon.

I was really glad that he was slowly letting me in into his conflict. As his friend and wife, I offered a piece of sage wisdom to him: he should speak with Claire. He then confided to me that he was afraid that Claire would be angered. I reasoned that if Claire truly loved him, she would understand.

In an instant, Bill's face brightened, as if the weight of the world was lifted from his shoulders. He looked relieved and thanked me for the wisdom. He also apologized for distancing himself from me. He should have known better than to push me aside.

He also apologized for not taking care of me, which might have led to the death of our child. He said that he had spent the entire time wallowing that he had forgotten about my needs. Hearing him say that was the healing I needed. I wasn't at fault, and I wasn't alone in this. I was mourning for my child's death, and so was Bill. We were grieving together. We were crying together. We didn't have go through this on our own. We had each other, for better or for worse, until death would part us. That was the vow we took, and that is the vow that we shall uphold.

We just sat there in the bath, holding each other and crying. My head was leaning on his thigh and my arms were wrapped around his waist. He held be from above and kissed my wet hair again and again, whispering words of assurances and support. It felt cathartic. We were soothing each other's souls.

Bill confided in me that he never though he would be this devastated by the loss of our child. While he had always imagined that Claire would be the mother of his children, the fact remained that the child we lost was of his own flesh and blood, and he was eager to bring a life into this world. I was touched to learn that he wanted a child to love, not an heir to succeed him, and as his wife, who am I to deny him that?

While the fires in the bath are still burning, I pulled Bill towards the tub. He was startled by my actions, but I explained to him that I am willing to try again. I want to be a mother too.

I did not know what had shifted in him, but his eyes darkened, and he did not resist when I took off his robe.

Some of the waters had splashed when he joined me in the tub. It had been too long since we were intimate, and I admit, I missed his touch. Apparently, he missed me too, because his kisses were urgent, and his hands were all over my body. Our movements were needy and desperate, as if we were starving lions being fed with fresh meat. I wanted him so badly, and he desired me just the same.

When he finally entered me, I let out a moan of relief. I needed this. I wanted this so badly. I wanted this not simply for the pleasure, but for the opportunity to fulfill our common dream. He was in my arms again, and both of us felt that there was nowhere else we would rather be. It’s as if we found our home in each other.

When we both finished, there was a sense of triumph inside me and it felt so right. I felt like I was given a second chance, with Bill and with our child. We held each other in the hot water for a long time, determined to get this right this time. We had overcome this obstacle, and we had come out stronger.

As my mother says, another sunrise is another chance.  
  



	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for the awesome feedback! I was really hesitant to post this at first because people might not feel it but I was wrong! You guys are awesome! 
> 
> Anyway, here comes the drama....

 

_Bill_

Each day, I discover something new about Hillary, and the more I know about her, the more I fall for her. I admired her already before this, but now, I find her irreplaceable. I cannot bear to be parted from her. She is like theEarth, and I am her moon, always being pulled towards her.

I already asked for her forgiveness for being a derelict husband. I could not believe she had forgiven me this easily. She had a heart of gold! I had expected her to take her time to be with herself, to properly grieve and express her anger, and I was willing to give her all the time that she needed. I was going to wait for as long as necessary, but she was a woman of incredible faith. She had assured me that she had completely forgiven my errors, and she simply wanted me by her side.

With the wounds of the death of our child still so fresh in our hearts, I told Hillary that while we both dream of becoming parents, we need not make haste. I wanted us to simply enjoy each other’s company. Just the two of us.Every night, I climbed to her bed and made love. Yes, we are making love, not just having sex. Because love is the only thing I can describe what I feel for her right now.

How did this happen? I do not know.

During our wedding, Hillary had received a dower from my Father: the Duchy of Monroe, which belonged to the kingdom of Florida but was invaded by my father during one of his sieges in his youth. Because she was still tense overher father’s health, I decided that we visit the duchy for a short vacation. She welcomed my idea and we had spent a month there. She loved the beaches. She loved walking in the sand and feeling the sea breeze. Every day, we would walk along the shoreline and watch the sun set. When the sun had already retired, and the moon had dominated the skies, we would make love, the salty waters splashing against our skin.

Despite my flourishing relationship with Hillary, I still worry about Claire. As Hillary counseled me, I had asked my vassals to watch over her, to protect her. Once in a while, I would ask them how Claire is doing. They said thatshe is doing well, and she is being cared for by her parents. And every day, I pray that she will find a man worthy of her love, because I had disappointed her in that regard. We made a vow to love each other, but I fell in love with my wife so easily.

I will finally let go of Claire, and she deserves to hear it from me.

xxx

_Hillary_

The more Bill and I become closer, the more he confuses me. But that is not to say that I do not appreciate his companionship and care. It’s just that he sometimes leaves me with so many questions in my mind.

Ever since we reconciled, we had resumed our habits of talking in the halls of our castle and him climbing into my bed right after. But lately, our talks had less talking and more kissing. And when we finish coupling, he wouldnot leave my bed like he used to. He wouldn’t sleep either. He would simply hold me and talk and talk more. I, on the other hand, was getting a little exhausted with this routine. I wasn’t complaining, though. I was just confused.

Bill had told me that he would visit Claire. I had given him my blessing, as long as nothing inappropriate would happen. However, he had had given me the impression that he was not looking forward to this. I had counseled him that it is the right and responsible thing to do. After he heard those words from me, he was soothed.

And then there were the small things. He usually appears out nowhere. He would visit me in my study or in the archives whenever he had finished convening with his vassals or whenever he arrived from his journey. His always asks how I am, despite having asked that question a few hours ago. I told him many, many times that he did not need to see me often. I had assured him that I feel fine and I am being careful with my health this time. But my husband was stubborn to the point that he was getting on my nerves sometimes. I told him that I am not blaming him for my miscarriage, and every time I reminded him so, he simply nods and then he goes back a few hours later asking me the same question. I am beginning to believe that he was teasing me for his amusement.

But the source of my biggest confusion wasn’t Bill. It was me.

One day, I had grown weary of reading books, which was a surprise to me because I loved reading. Like Bill, I have yet to find a book that I do not love. I decided to go down to the kitchens for some bread. When I arrived, I hadfound our baker, Stephen, preparing the ovens for baking. I had a sudden interest in his chore to I begged him to teach me how to bake. Our poor baker was bewildered by my request. He was afraid to teach me because if anyone saw me doing a slave’s chore, he would certainly be punished by my husband. I assured him that as the lady of the house, I could vouch for him, and my husband would not punish him.

And so, I had begun my baking lesson. Stephen had identified each ingredient and its properties. I thought that this was a very insightful lecture. It was very different from the language and philosophy lessons that I had undertaken when I was a child, but it was more fun!

Stephen demonstrated how to mix the flour, eggs, yeast and salt, and then he let me try. When the sticky mixture had finally turned smooth, it was time to knead the dough. Stephen sprinkled the counter with some floor so that the dough would not stick. I pulled the dough from the bowl and put it on top of the flour-coated surface.

Suddenly, I heard my husband’s voice.

“What are you doing, Hillary?” asked Bill.

Bill looked like he had caught his prey. Poor Stephen looked as if he had seen a ghost. I, on the other hand, was calm as ever. I told Bill that I asked Stephen for a baking lesson. Bill’s stern look suddenly brightened.

“Why didn’t you say so, my dear wife?” he chuckled. “Can I help you knead the dough?”

I nodded. The dough was quite heavy, so his assistance was very much welcome. He stood behind me, my back pressing against his chest. His head was near the crook of my shoulder, so that his mouth was right next to my ear. Taking my hands into his, he reached for the dough so that it was underneath our fingertips.

“I tried baking once,” he fondly recalled. His voice sent a slight shiver in my spine as his breath tickled my ear.

“How was it?” I tried focusing my attention on the dough rather on the silkiness of his voice.

“It went well. But of course, I had help,” he said.

He laced our fingers together, and began to press them into the dough, using the heels of our hands to move and mold it.

 

Stephen became silent as Bill whispered his instructions in my ear.

“You have to push harder so that the air will properly circulate within the dough,” he breathed out. Our hands were definitely doing what we were supposed to do, but it was becoming difficult for me not to be caught up in the feel of his hands, which I never realized were so slender and beautiful.

“If the dough didn’t rise,” I said, moving my head to the side to look back at him, “that would be bad?”

My eyes locked with his, those dull blue orbs enticing mine. I could not breathe, not because he was crushing me. I was caught off guard. I did not know what…happened. But something definitely happened.

“Yes,” he managed to choke out. “It would be unfortunate.”

I think my hands were still kneading the dough, but I had lost track of what I was doing because my eyes were drawn to his lips, and I was enticed to kiss them. I felt myself drawing closer to him, and my imagination must be playing tricks on me because I thought I saw him inch closer.

But the spell that engulfed me was suddenly broken when I heard the crash of a bowl hitting the floor. We both jumped. Our hands must have pushed the bowl. I sprang away from him, as if I had somehow been burned by his touch. My chest was heaving, like I had run a few miles. My heart was thundering like never before.

I excused myself, despite Bill’s pleas. I needed some fresh air. I didn’t know what happened at the kitchen, but whatever it was, I needed to regain my footing. And Bill must have thought I was insane. I have made a total fool of myself in front of my husband. I was so embarrassed that I had lied that I was not well so that he would not climb into my bed. It took a couple of days for me to pull my courage to face him, and when he had met again, I was thankful that he made no mention of the incident in the kitchen.

But during those days when I pretended to be ill, I found myself feeling alone whenever I would wake up. I had accustomed to waking up next to his warm body and being the recipient of his morning kisses. Sometimes, he pleasures me with his finger before my maid would arrive to bathe me, and I would return the favor with my mouth, as he taught me how to do a few months ago when I asked him if he had something in mind that he wanted me to fulfill. Truth be told, his presence meant something to me that was not there before we reconciled. And that was the thing that confused me the most. What had changed in me?

xxx

_Roger_

My beloved brother,

It is my deepest regret to inform you that Father has passed away in his mission to bring peace to Afghanistan. He had been ambushed by forces loyal to the King. His death breaks my heart, and I am sure it will devastate Mother.

We gave Father a small funeral in the site where he was killed. We are rushing to get back home so that our country can properly mourn their king and Father can be laid in peace with his parents, whom he loved so much. Please pray for our safe journey, dear brother.

You know as well as I do that it is your duty to succeed Father in the event of his death. You must assume the throne now, even with the heaviest of heart. Always know that Mother, your wife and I are here to support you.

Always,

Roger

xxx

_Bill_

The news of my Father's death was devastating. I felt the Earth shake beneath my feet. My pillar, my advocate, my mentor...gone. Gone too soon. . He simply wished that the world he would hand over to his heirs is a more peaceful and more prosperous one. But that dream was taken away from him by soulless, wicked men who had taken advantage of his kind heart. He died as a hero. He may be so forgiving, but I cannot promise I will be as kind as my father.

If I was devastated by his sudden passing, it was nothing compared to Mother's reaction when I informed her of this heart-breaking news. She wailed and wept in front of our servants and vassals like a mad woman. She could not be consoled no matter how hard we tried.

Quietly mourning my Father's death was my wife. As my Mother made a spectacle, she stood behind everyone, silently wiping her tears. She was fond of my Father, and he was fond of her. They had developed a bond that was unique between a father and his daughter-in-law. Their connection was rooted in deep respect for each other and in their mutual desire to bring peace in our lands. Father had always thought highly of her, and she had admired

him for his wisdom. She has found an ally in him whenever Mother was not happy with her presence. Now that Father's gone, my wife had lost a dear friend.

As the regent of my Father's kingdom, I declared a year of mourning for this death. And the crown prince of Arkansas, it is my duty to assume the thrown in his death. However, as a sign of respect to my beloved Father, I will postpone my coronation until the period of mourning is over. My vassals had no objections to my decree, and so it shall be done.  

My Father's remains arrived two weeks after we received the word of his death. I broke down when I saw Roger and his men carrying Father's coffin. Mother wept at the body of her husband. Roger was as devastated. My wife held my arm as I cried, and she became my pillar in these times of grief. She carried herself with strength, grace and dignity befitting of a future Queen. I do not how could I have survived these trying times without her.

My father's funeral was attended by the royalty and nobility of the different kingdoms of America, ally and foe alike. A death of a king is one of the rare occasions where enemies stand together to honor a fallen comrade. Naturally, Hillary's uncle, Howard, was in attendance. But despite the tension between our alliances, I welcomed him as my Father would have.

In the midst of my grief, I was mindful of any sign of aggression towards Hillary. So far, Howard had not approached my wife. Had he lay even a finger on her, he would be unceremoniously thrown out of the ceremonies.

He is a king, but today, he is merely a guest in my household. I can banish him if I wish to.

On the last day of the mourning ritual, my Father was finally laid to rest. That night, we served a sumptuous feast for all the kings who were in attendance. It was a night celebrating the fellowship of the kings despite their enmity.

Hillary was beside me all night. She had been as gloomy as I was during the period of mourning. The grief and exhaustion from entertaining the mourners had been too much for her. She had requested a short leave from her duties as the royal hostess. I had let her rest for several days. But despite that, she had barely recovered.

My wife had asked for permission to retire early. I had kissed her good night. I anxiously watched her disappear into the dark halls of our castle. I reminded myself I would not allow her to return to her royal duties, despiteany objections she might make.

The banquet wasn't as festive as the others that we usually host. Given as such, the feast had ended earlier. I was thankful that this had come to a close. Tomorrow, the kings will depart home, and things will return to normal.

As I walked towards my bedchamber, I heard a faint pounding. It was frantic, as if someone had been desperately calling for help. My ears followed the source of that sound. Not long after, I was joined by two of my men, who had also heard the sound. We split up and searched for the source of the sound. I was no closer it. But fortunately, one of the men called for me as he had already found it.

The source was behind the door of an empty cupboard. Whoever was on the other side was still pounding.

"Fear not," I said, "help has arrived."

I was met with a muffled cry of a woman, and that heightened our sense of urgency. Thank God one of the men had the key to the door. In one fell swoop, the door was open. My eyes fell to the body of the floor, which belonged to my wife.

I was stunned to find her tied up and locked behind that cupboard. I swiftly untied her and removed the cover of her mouth. She was clad in her nightgown, and tears wet her eyes. She immediately sought for my protection, and I engulfed her in my warm embrace. She was sobbing in my chest.

She detailed how she was found in the cupboard. When sleep did not come to her, she decided that she would wait in the door of my bedchamber because she desired my presence. On her way to my bedchamber, she met her uncle Howard. Her hatred of her uncle made her uncivil. She spat on him, and he was infuriated. He hit her and overpowered her. He attempted to force himself on her, with the intention of getting her pregnant. He did so because if ever her family had regained its position and her Father's heirs will die, her son, born of her Uncle's flesh and blood, will succeed. He also had the intention of ruining her as an act of spite against her Father.

Hearing her story incited the fury in me that I never thought I had. That pig who calls himself a king deserves to die my hand. Immediately, I asked my men to search for Howard and bring him to me. As they executed my command, my attention returned to my wife.

I picked her up from the floor and she wrapped her arms around my neck. She had calmed down already, but I knew she was still shaken to the core. I carried her towards my bed, where I tucked her under the covers. I would have left to deal with Howard, but her eyes were begging me not to leave her. And so, I removed my shirt and slipped myself behind her, enclosing her in a cocoon of love.

xxx

_ Hillary _

I woke up to Bill's arms and his strong chest. The sun was already up, but I was surprised that he was still in bed. His shirt was gone and he only had his breeches on. He seemed to have not left my side since we had slept.

I was greeted with a relieved smile and a caress on my cheek. I never thought his simple greeting of "Good morning" would be so cathartic.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked.

I nodded. Indeed, the warmth of his body lulled me more than the thick covers that shrouded us.

"I am glad," he replied.

Bill then told me that he had decided to take the day off so that we could both rest. I welcomed his initiative. He also told me that Uncle Howard had escaped after he had assaulted me. Bill assured that Uncle Howard cannot step his foot anywhere in Arkansas, lest he be put to death immediately.

The trauma of last night's events still shook me. I would be lying if I wasn't hurt and afraid, but I refused to see myself as a victim. The more they try to take away my power, the more I shall affirm my strength. And today, I want to show myself that I still am in control of my destiny.

And today, I choose to be with Bill.

Being intimated just hours after almost being assaulted by my Uncle was perhaps the best of ideas, but for me, I want to send a message to Bill and me that I am strong, that I am worth ten of a man my Uncle is.

And I wanted to let Bill know that I am not letting a tragedy define me.

The look of surprise in Bill's face was endearing when I began to undress him. He was concerned that I wasn’t in the right state of mind, but I insisted that I wanted his, that I wanted to fight back and refuse to bemoan my misfortunes.

Bill let out a smile that said how proud he was of me, and I was touched by his encouragement. He let me take off his breeches and I began to pleasure him. But he always made sure I was feeling the pleasure too. While my tongue was working on him, his fingers were touching me expertly, telling me that this was the treatment I deserved. I felt vindicated, knowing that I have defeated my Uncle in more ways than one.

And when Bill entered me, we gasped in unison. Our eyes never left each other's. The fire of our passion burned all my fears away. As we both came to completion, we were reminded that there is always the dawn after the darkness, and that wisdom spoke both to me and Bill.

As we lay in his bed, simply looking at each other, I saw Bill in another light. I had read books, sang songs and watched plays about it. But I think that it was a complete farce, that it didn't exist, that it was just simply a ploy by writers to put their audience in a nonexistent trance and hypnotize them. But now, I know for a fact that it exists.

I love Bill. I love him more than I thought I could.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a relatively short chapter, yet there is so much dramaaaaaaaaaa. 
> 
> Thanks to grahamnortonrocks for being a wonderful beta and an expert on all things edible! =)))
> 
> P.S. Good luck to all those who joined the Omaze raffle!

_ Bill _

I asked the doctor to repeat what he had just said, but apparently it was real, before me, Hillary asked him to repeat it too. When we were sure that we heard what we thought we heard, we both believed that the doctor was playing us for fools.

But the doctor was certain. Based on the symptoms that he observed, there can only be, he said, one conclusion: Hillary is pregnant.

After we left my bedchambers for a late breakfast, I called for a doctor to check on Hillary's health. The doctor said that beyond some cuts and bruises Hillary should be fine. But he had observed something else that prompted him to ask Hillary more questions about her health in general. She told him that she had been feeling ill recently and her usual strength wasn't there, but she attributed it to the grueling duties of a royal hostess and her grief following Father's death.

But the doctor was quite confident in his observations, and he even invited us to seek another doctor to look at my wife. But what I heard was enough, and slowly, I caught up with the pronouncement. From a terrible nightmare just a few hours ago came these glad tidings. What a reversal of fortunes!

No one was more shocked to hear this than Hillary. She still could not believe it, but this was a welcome development after her horrible experience last night. She took her time to take everything in, but when it finally caught up on her, there was nothing that could dampen her happiness.

"Oh Bill!" she cried in my chest, "we are going to be parents!"

Yes! I am going to be a father, and I could not be more excited! I will finally have a young one running around the castle, playing tricks on the servants, riding a young pony from the stables, or reading a book, just like we usually do. Will our child be personable, like me? Or will it be like her mother, always calm in the midst of pressure and hysteria?

Because the risk of her miscarrying again is high, I ordered Hillary to take a leave from her royal duties. I was relieved that she did not object. But following the threat on her life, I asked the doctor not to speak of this to anybody. We will announce her pregnancy in due time, but not now.

We spent the rest of the day to ourselves. Hillary was still recovering so she slept again, and I joined her. When she woke up, she wanted to be intimate again, and so I obliged her. I was astounded that even though her body was physically exhausted, her sexual appetite was not diminished.

That night, when it was really time to go to bed, Hillary did not want to sleep alone, and she did not want to sleep in her bed either. And so I took her to my bed. I realized that she looked immaculate against my dark sheets. We did not have sex again, but we simply held each other until sleep claimed us.

xxx

_ Hillary _

My dear Betsy,

I have glad tidings for you: I am with child! The doctor told us that I am expecting, and I could not believe my ears at first. But it's real. I am going to be a mother soon!

Just thinking about carrying a life inside gives me so much happiness, as if nothing else mattered except my child, who I am sure will be showered with nothing but love. Though my new angel cannot and will never take away the pain of losing my first child, I still feel blessed.

My husband is more ecstatic than I am. He cannot get his hands away from my growing stomach. But to be fair, I too cannot resist touching my belly. I always rub my belly wherever I am for no reason. I do not know why, but I just do. And the best part is that naysayers glare at me whenever I do. Ha! They will surely now regret ever doubting me.

I should tell you now: Bill and I want you to be our child's godmother. We both agreed that there is no one better suited for the role than you are. We hope that you will not turn us down.

I shall be due in March. You should visit us by then so that can meet your godchild.

Always,

Hillary

xxx

_ Bill _

I became the regent of my kingdom when my Father left for Afghanistan. I thought that my short time as the ruler of Arkansas would prepare me for the actual role as king. But I was mistaken. I am overwhelmed by the duties and responsibilities that come with the crown. And it doesn´t help that I am still mourning for my Father’s death and my wife is having a delicate pregnancy.

The entire world was weighing heavily on my shoulders, and it was affecting my relationships with the people around me. But the person most affected was Hillary. Because of the exhaustion and pressure, I was not able to find time to see her or even to climb to her bed. Whenever I would visit her in her bedchamber, she had already gone to sleep, and I had no heart to wake her up. She needed her rest for our child.

And I knew I had promised Hillary that I would speak to Claire to resolve our relationship, but I wasn’t to do that either. I thought Claire would come to my Father’s funeral but to my disappointment, she didn’t accompany her Father on the said occasion. I truly needed to find time for her, but my personal woes are pushed behind the woes of my kingdom.

xxx

_ Hillary _

Bill graciously gave me leave from my duties as Queen Consort-in-waiting, but I would very much rather fulfill my duties and assist him than being confined in my apartment, though I understand the need for me to not be subjected to pressure. It’s just the life of a traditional wife is not meant for me. But for the sake of our child, I shall overcome it.

When he assumed the responsibilities of being the ruler of Arkansas, Bill hadn’t had much time for me. I understood the pressures of his new role. I was angry at my body for being weak and frail during the time my husband needed me the most. But it couldn’t be helped. My duty as his wife was to bear him a child, and I shall not fail on that regard a second time.

As time passed, his prolonged absence laid out a painful truth in front of me: Bill had already fulfilled his duty as a husband, and that is to spawn a child. Of course, he had no more business with me. He had no more reason to climb to my bed and to talk to me. His end of the bargain was done.

I was naïve to think for a second that he would fall in love with me, given that he had a woman out there who was the love of his life. I was once a skeptic of the love between a man and a woman, but now I know for myself that it is real. It’s just that it probably isn’t for me and Bill. It’s just the way it is, and I have to accept it as the bitter truth.

But that is not to say I could not love him still. I will, because I can. I know Bill enough to know what he needs, and right now, I know exactly what.

Claire.

xxx

Lady Claire,

Perhaps you might wonder why your lover's wife is writing to you when your last encounter with her ended in tears.

I have a proposition for you. My husband loves you so much and given the death of his father and his sudden ascent to the throne, I believe more than ever, that he needs your love and constant support.

I formally invite you to the castle as his mistress, and I will bless your renewed romance. However, this is not without consequences to you. You cannot approach my husband's bedchamber. You can only sleep with him if he comes to you. And your romance should never bear fruit. I believe this is a fair compromise, as I cannot have the hard work I've done go to waste.

If you accept these terms, return to our castle with the messenger who brought this letter. I must ask you to swear to utmost secrecy, as such a scandal might ruin my husband.

And lastly, as a woman, I plead that I will never see you two together. My heart will not stand it.

_Hillary Diane Alexandra Victoria of New York and Arkansas, Duchess of Monroe_

xxx

_ Bill _

I returned from Fayetteville to settle some disputes and to visit my subjects and friends. I stopped by our old residence to pick up my old things, things that I used when I was a baby. As I gathered my things, I felt excited to show these to Hillary and for our child to use these. I mean, what father would not be excited to pass his toys and clothes to this child?

I know I have been an absent husband recently, but I am determined to change that. I will show these things to Hillary and then we can finally start thinking of a name for our child.

Once I arrived home from my journey, I was adamant to see my wife immediately. I was told that she was in the gardens, walking. However, I was informed that there was a guest waiting for me in the cabinet.

As royal protocol, I proceeded to the cabinet to attend to my guest, as they cannot be kept waiting. I was expecting that a minister, a diplomat, or a vassal was waiting for me. However, a woman with golden hair and a fair complexion, familiar yet for foreign, greeted me.

"Hi, Bill," said the woman, who I recognized was Claire. She ran towards me and sank into my chest.

I was stupefied and left speechless, but I was glad to see her. "Oh Claire."

"I missed you so much!" she held me tighter.

I had missed her too, but for some reason, I could not voice that out. "What brings you here?"

"I am here to be with you Bill!" she said excitedly.

I did not understand what she meant, or if she was serious.

"But I am married," I said.

Claire giggled. "I know. But Lady Hillary gave us her blessing to resume our romance."

I was further confused. "What?...Why?"

"She said you needed me. So she sent for me. And here I am!"

I could not say I was glad that she was staying here, but I did not have the heart to send her away either. Oh God. My plan to make-up to Hillary had just been shattered to pieces. And to make matters worse, Claire is here.

I will have to figure out what course of action to take. This is the one situation I never thought I'd be in.

xxx

_ Hillary _

I came out from the cabinet after I finished writing my letter to Mother. It was to my utmost surprise to see that Lady Claire was waiting for me.

She asked for a short audience, which I granted. We chose to walk towards the courtyard, which was empty.

Claire thanked me for allowing her to be with Bill. She did not think she would see Bill again, let alone resume their romance. She said that I had given her a second chance at love. I was glad for her, but not without a sting in my heart.

Lady Claire noticed the small bump in my stomach. I revealed to her that indeed, I was pregnant. I apologized to her for forbidding her to have a child with my husband, but she bore no ill will against me. She was happy just to be near Bill, and at that moment, I felt so small. She was so sure of Bill's love for her that she did not see me as a threat. I, on the other hand, was being overcome by my jealousy.

I did not want to prolong this conversation further, so I bid her goodbye, but I was stopped by a single question from her.

"Do you love Bill, your grace?"

My entire body shook. I debated myself whether to answer her question. I could choose not to, but I saw no reason to hide it from her.

I turned away, as I whispered, "Yes. More than I thought I did."

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After this, there is just one chapter left. Time flies so fast :))))

_Bill_

I had given my best efforts to speak to Hillary, but she consistently shut me out. I did not know what I did or said to merit such a cold treatment from her. We eat our meals together. We still talk. I still seek her advice, but when I changed the conversation about us or about our child, she creates a wall between us. I even wanted to touch her belly, and she allowed me once. But when she raised her skirt and my fingers touched her skin, she jumped as if she was burned, and she quickly excused herself.

Claire had grown attached me to me ever since she got here, and this had become more and more of a problem. She was always following me when I was alone, increasing the risk of us being seen by my wife. God, I don't want her to see us. I was feeling a tremendous amount guilt already. She had given me the liberty to be with my lover and yet I could not do the same for her.

But beyond my guilt is my heartbreak. I know I love my wife. I have loved her, I am sad to say, more than I have ever loved Claire, if that was even possible. I never thought that I will fall for Hillary. I imagined that we will be friendly at best, and I had long accepted that. But somehow, she found her way into my heart, and gave me the best gift I could ever wish for: a child.

But as I contemplated my relationship with Hillary, I remembered that she had always been a skeptic of the love between a man and a woman, and understandably so, because she had seen too many divorces in her family in New York. We Southern nobles are as bad as our Northern counterparts, yet we were raised in the notion that we are destined to be with one person for the rest of our lives.  And for me, that was Hillary. However, I regret to say that Hillary does not feel the same for me.

She's not in love with me. That's the only explanation that could explain why she called my lover to our castle and had stopped talking and being intimate with me. Her duty to me and to the vow that we took is already done. She would just raise our heir and I would lead our troops to reclaim their family domains from her uncle. I had every intention of doing the latter, but my heart felt heavy, and my motivation sank. Before, I wanted to defeat her Uncle so badly because he hurt her, and I wanted to reclaim what is rightfully hers. But now, it was more of an obligation than a passion.

xxx

_Hillary_

Dearest Mother,

I know that you did not approve of what I did, but I know you understand why. All I ask is your support, because I need every ounce of it.

I have given Bill the liberty to be with Lady Claire at night because I know she is what he needs right now. But he keeps following me all day. He always asks for updates on how I am, and how our child is. Sometimes, I let him rub my growing belly, but only over my dress. I did not want a repeat of the time when I lifted my skirt and I was so overwhelmed that I ran away. He deserves to be at his child's side, and to his credit, he is doing a good job at it.

Something is bothering me, Mother. Whenever Lady Claire sees me with Bill, her face darkens, as if the Devil has resided in her. She was cordial and friendly at the beginning, even giving me flowers. But as time passed by, she seemed to nurse an ill will against me. But why? Does she think I am taking Bill's affections away from her? I have done nothing to further Bill's affections for me. Why is she insecure? I am not sure if that is the reason, but I am too proud to ask her.

In the midst of all of this, I am excited to welcome our child. My child is the ray of happiness in this lonely castle. And I cannot wait to kiss my child when he or she is in my arms.

Your beloved daughter,

Hillary

xxx

_ Bill _

The royal jousting games are a favorite sport in Arkansas, and it is the time of the year where we hold the games. Knights and squires all over the kingdom descend upon Little Rock to compete for the highest honor. Also, the victor will be deemed eligible to marry the daughter of the Earl of Washington, who is of incomparable beauty. Maybe it was married man speaking in me, but I find her plain and ordinary.

At the games, my wife and I are obligated to watch. I have given Claire a decent seat in the arena so that I can watch over her. Hillary, still being told to be careful by her doctor, would only stay until noon. This would be the longest I've been with her since we discovered that she was pregnant. I was happy to have her company, but I was disappointed because I know she will not destroy the invisible wall that separated us ever since.

As a kind gesture, I chose to wait for her and we would enter the arena jointly. She was disgruntled to find me waiting for her already, as she should always leave and arrive before me.

"I am deeply sorry that I kept you waiting," she bowed in humility.

"No. I am just a young man waiting for his lady. Pay no mind to rules and obligations when you are with me," I said.   
My words had an opposite effect on her. She became confused. Just before we emerge outside, when when our maids and lads had already left us alone, I held her and and held a tight grip.

"What is it?" she asked, "do you require something?"

I was supposed to say something, to tell her that I missed her, but those blue orbs staring in my direction was enough to drive the rational thought out of me. Instead, I pulled her into a deep, desperate kiss. I felt the shock in her lips when I did so, but she quickly caught on. It was so good, and it was so right. She was kissing me which as much fervor as I did. Her hand were all over my body, from my neck, to my back and down to my bottom. My palms were covering her breasts that had blossomed during the pregnancy. Her tongue was thick and sweet like honey. I was drunk in my passion for her that I wanted to skip the games and spend the day in her bed or mine. But the public awaits us.

I held her like it was our wedding, and we took our seats in the box reserved for us. I was a little annoyed at whoever built this box; her seat was a little too far from mine, so any chance of holding her while we were watching was gone.   
At exactly noon, my wife asked to be excused. But before she did so, I made a quiet whisper to her ear.

"Can I visit you in your bedchamber? Tonight?" I asked.

She was flustered by my request, but she nodded all the same. "Of course," she said.

I kissed her hand. Sunset could not come soon.

When I arrived at the doorstep of her bedchamber, I had the chance of bumping into Claire, who was in her nightgown and who was carrying a candle in her hand. She was looking very distraught.

I wanted to be with Hillary that night. I haven't touched her since we learned of her pregnancy, but I was not planning to do it tonight. I just wanted to talk with her, to comfort her emotionally. She may think that the reason that I had stopped coming to her at night was because I was touching Claire, but I wasn't. I had no heart to be in anyone's bed because I feel terrible for them. All this time, I was sleeping on my own. I do not even pay attention to my needs, because I am so drawn with guilt for the terrible situation I have put them to.

I pulled Claire towards the corner where we could not be heard, and she began to plead.

"Bill," she said, "I want you. And I know I should be thankful that your wife let me be with you, but I am not."

"I am so sorry, my dear," I said, but my apology was beyond my pity for her.

"I want to be with you. I am driven mad with jealousy, Bill."

"You don't have to," I said. That was the truth, because my wife already has my heart.

"But I am, and I want to fight for us."

I did not respond. I simply let her on.

"My Father knows of an apothecary that trades this special poison that leaves no trace," Claire said. "Once your child is born and your legacy secure, you will be free again!"

It took a while for me to fully understand what Claire had been suggesting. My blood surged like lava in an exploding volcano. I didn't realize how hard I was gripping her until she winced in pain.

"Ow! Bill! It hurts!" she moaned.

"How dare you suggest that I murder my wife," I spat at her, disgusted. "She had welcomed you graciously. Consented to resuming our romance, even. She does not deserve this from you."

"But she is playing her devilish tricks, Bill!" she pleaded. "She seduces you during the day, so you will come to her at night!"

"That is wrong."

"What?!"

"I do not come to her at night, just as I do not come to yours."

"Why?" Claire pleaded.

It was finally time to tell her. My indecisiveness has caused pain to both my wife and Claire. I must put a stop to this, even it is too late.

"I love my wife, Claire," I said. "I tried to remain yours. I truly did. But she was different. She caught me without even trying. She was the one I needed, and she needed me too. She is beautiful, smart, energetic, warm and caring."

Claire looked at me with tremendous shock, and then later, devastated.

"The mere suggestion of murdering the Queen-to-be is punishable by death, “ I said. "But to you, I will make an exception. You shall return to your home in Fayetteville and you shall be confined to it for the rest of your life. You shall be escorted back to your home first thing in the morning."

"But...Bill...!"

Claire's pleas fell into my deaf ears and I walked back towards Hillary's bedchambers.

xxx

_Hillary_

My dearest Betsy,

I had gone back to New York. I thought I’d be able to fulfill my duty as Bill’s wife, as I have vowed to do when I married him. But I had never been so mistaken.

It was no secret to me that my husband was in love with someone else when I married him. I sympathized with him on that. Pitied him even. But I had clear expectations on our marriage: that we will remain faithful to each other and will do everything to make their marriage work. Bill had been forthcoming in that regard. 

In time, we became friends. He was a good husband. Of course, like any other couple, we have had differences. But we have proven that there is nothing we cannot conquer. I had begun to be optimistic about this marriage. I was becoming accustomed his company, and he to mine. I thought that we can even outlast the marriages in my family.

And then, something unexpected happened: I fell in love with him. I know you are stunned to hear this, as I am a skeptic of romantic and courtly love. But I think I am in love with him. I had always wanted to see him. I missed him whenever he was away. I wanted him always in my bed. I wanted him always in my heart.

When I found out I was pregnant, Bill had stopped seeing me. He must have done so because his duty is done. And I do not blame him for it. It was just fair. It’s just unfortunate that I had developed feelings for him that will never be reciprocated. But you know me, Betsy. I am not to weep around for her woes. I soldiered on.

Because I loved him so much, I thought he needed the love of his life by his side, so I called her and let her live with us as his mistress. But I had conditions. She was never to come to his bed, and they can never have children. The woman was grateful that I even let her see her love, and so she accepted these terms.

I thought my conditions were fair. I had let them run around the castle, kissing and fucking. I am willing to be hurt, just so Bill will be happy, and my Father can regain his position. But little did I know that Bill and his mistress still weren’t happy.

One I heard footsteps approaching towards my room. I was about to open the door when I heard the mistress’s voice. Apparently, the footsteps belonged to Bill, and the mistress wanted to have a conversation. They hid in a corner so that nobody could hear them. I knew I would be hurt but what I would hear, but jealous as I was, I left my room and silently eavesdropped on their conversation. I heard the mistress proposing that I be killed by a poison that leaves to trace. I was mortified and hurt but what she is merely suggesting so I dashed back to my room. Several moments later, Bill came to me, distraught. He wanted to comfort me, but I did not want to talk to him. I was disgusted by the mere contact of our fingers. I hid my pain in my mask of exhaustion, and so Bill left my bed disappointed.

The next day, I had told a lie that Father’s health was deteriorating and so I needed to visit Father here in New York. Bill was unwilling to let me go, citing my pregnancy. But I had managed to convince him that.

To my utter confusion, Bill kissed me in the lips when he bid me goodbye. It was as passionate as I could remember, and I wanted more, but I shouldn’t. I was angry at myself for falling victim for his charms again.

And now, I am contemplating divorce. As I am doing so, I shall negotiate talks with my Uncle. I know he is my enemy, but right now, we have one common foe: my husband. I shall figure out what I will do once we have brought about my husband’s ruin. It is simply fair that he should be punished for trying to destroy our alliance.

Despite the change in circumstances, my desire for you to be my child’s godmother still stands. Visit me here in our castle in Albany please.

Love,

Hillary

xxx

_Bill_

I did not know what I did to make Hillary decide to divorce from our marriage. She did not tell me why in her letter informing of her decision. I thought she simply needed to attend to her Father’s health, and despite my objections, I allowed her to go home. Little did I know that she would be fleeing from our home!

I was angry and devastated when I read her letter. I felt I was sucker-punched. Nothing could explain her erratic behavior recently, and no matter how hard I tried to come up with an explanation, I always come up short. Why did she call Claire to our castle? Why has she maintained her distance from me? And why did she leave abruptly?

I brought my troubles to my Mother, who was quick to come up with an explanation: She was having an affair. She noted that the women of New York are she-wolves. They are cunning and sly. My besotted mind was blind to see that. And though Mother did a good job convincing me that, my heart refused to believe such accusation. Hillary os not like that. She just isn't.

If I were to at least consider consenting to the divorce, which I never will, I am going to have to speak to her personally.

xxx

_Hillary_

I travelled to my Uncle's castle and our former home, humbled and humiliated. He was once my former enemy, and now, I seek for his help to depose a common foe. I had not informed my Mother and Father of my plan, nor to my brother. My uncle would refuse me, I will threaten to expose the crime he has done to me.

I was met with graciousness by his wife, Amelie. She was twenty years younger than him. Based on her subtle body language, she had no love for him anymore. It was a stark contrast against the loving picture I saw during their marriage. If anything, she was staying because of their son, Little Howard. If my Uncle dies, then her son would become the legitimate heir of New York.

Lady Amelie has told me to wait for my Uncle in his cabinet. In all likelihood, she must not have known what my Uncle did to me back in Arkansas. Being with my Uncle all alone brought terrible memories back. However, I did not fault her for her ignorance. If anything, I pity her because she was a victim of my Uncle too.

Minutes later, my Uncle greeted me with a hint of mockery when he entered the cabinet. He had a sick kind of glee watching me humble myself to him. I felt disgusted of myself, but between my husband and him, he was the better option.

He proceeded to gloat over me. He had always been a proud man. I too am proud but I know to choose my battles, and defending my pride doesn't help my cause right now.

"So," he finally said when he had taken his satisfaction in humiliating me. "What is your purpose for coming here?"  
I simply told him that I had a change of heart, that I come to him to help him plot my husband's downfall. Of course, I did not reveal why I came here in the first place. I deemed it best to keep my cards close to my chest. When I laid out my intention, a mixture of anger and hurt engulfed me. Plotting against Bill, it seemed so...wrong. But no matter what I felt, I had to bring him to justice.

My Uncle laughed hysterically at my request. Of course, he was skeptical. He asked me for my proof of allegiance to him. I told him that I had already asked for divorce. He laughed harder. It seemed that he had deduced what happened between my husband and me.

"Divorces run in our blood, my dear niece," Uncle Howard laughed. "You should have known it by now."

I did know it. That was why I fought tooth and nail not to fall in love with him. But I did anyway. And I bear the pain of my ignorance and naivety.

In the end, after taking much delight in my misery, my Uncle had finally consented to my alliance. I was to instruct my troops to secretly siege my husband's camps. Of course, the betrayal will not happen overnight, but we are faithful that we will succeed.

Before I left the cabinet, my Uncle has some choice words for me.

"You know, it's pity that you are a woman," he said, " because had you been a man, I would have certainly cowered at your mere sight. Instead, I get hard every time I do."

My blood boiled at his remark, and it took everything in me not to stab him with the dagger hidden beneath my dress.  
Just as I entered my carriage, I felt a sharp stab of pain in my belly.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the final chapter of The Consort. I hope you enjoyed reading this! I'll be posting updates to my other fics in the coming days. :)))

_Bill_

I raced towards the Rodham castle as fast as I could. I only took my horse and a squire in my journey. It took us weeks to get to New York. I would have travelled at night as well if not for my tired companion. I pity them for the tremendous strain I put on them, but I could not overemphasize how much time was of the essence.  
  
When I arrived at the castle, I was not immediately welcomed. I was told that my wife was not available to see any guests, but I was insistent. She had shut herself before and I was too timid. But now, I persisted. I threatened not to leave the doors unless I was given entry. Finally, the sentry relented.  
  
Upon my entrance, I found the servants in a hurry. Most of them were occupied and running like chickens with their heads cut off. Only one was there to welcome me. She apologized for the lack of graciousness but she explained that there was an emergency in the household.  
  
I asked her what the emergency was, in case I could be of assistance. The girl hesitated to tell me at first. I had the sense that there was a shroud of secrecy hovering over the castle.  
  
"My lord," the girl whispered, "the lady of the house is giving birth."  
  
I was puzzled. "Who is the lady of the house?"

"Why, Lady Hillary, my lord."

As soon as I heard her name, my heart raced. My wife was giving birth at that moment! I asked the girl where my wife was, and she told me the directions to my wife's bedchambers. I rushed towards Hillary's bedchamber, and when I arrived, I was met with a group of women huddled around the doorway. I could hear my wife's screams from inside. I tried to make an entry despite the objections from the women. To put it mildly, the women were not at all happy to see the man whom their lady was divorcing. But I  forced my way in. Whe I was finally inside, I found Hillary squirming in pain, with her legs spread out on the bed.  
  
Queen Dorothy saw me, and she wasted no time shoving me out. But I insisted that it was my child who was being born, and I deserved to be there. Queen Dorothy, on the other hand, fiercely argued that her daughter didn't want me to be here. I couldn't blame the Queen; I wasn't a good husband to her daughter, but being with Hillary on this very important moment was my way of making amends.  
  
Our argument had been cut short when we heard Hillary scream again, and it looked like the baby would come out this time. I immediately went to my wife's side and held her hand.  
  
"That's it," I said. "Just a little more. Our baby will come out now..."  
  
"Alright, my lady!" the midwife excitedly said, "your child is here!"  
  
I felt relief wash all over me. Our baby was safely delivered, and my wife's suffering had ended. I kissed her hand lovingly. She turned her heard towards me, her face all pale and sweaty.  
  
"What are you doing here?" she said weakly.

"I came for you," I said. "I read your letter and I want to fix things between us."

For a split second, I swear I saw the hint of happiness in her eyes, before she closed them. I pressed the back of my hand on her forehead and then I let her take her well-earned rest.  
  
The midwife finished cleaning Hillary and our baby. She had informed us that our baby is a girl, and I could not be happier. The midwife was confused as to whom should she should hand the baby over, whether to me or to Queen Dorothy, but the latter grudgingly yielded to me. I received our baby from the midwife, and I have never felt so much love for any person. I held our little angel in my arms. She was crying, but I soothed her with my gentle cradle. She immediately fell silent, satisfied by the arms that rocked her to sleep.  
  
I knelt beside Hillary and nudged her awake. When she saw our baby, a burst of energy seemed to have surged insider her. She was still frail, but she was more alive than I have seen her a few minutes ago.  
  
"Hillary, our child says hello," I said to Hillary. "Little angel, here's your Mama," I then said to our baby.  
  
Our child kept sleeping, but we admired her all the same.  
I have two girls to care for now, and they are all I need.

xxx

_ Hillary _

I have no idea why my husband is here. I already told him that I wanted a divorce yet travelled all the way to New York. What's worse that he came just in time for our child's birth. I wanted him away from our child, but I was too weak to push him away whenever he was near.  
  
I would have preferred that he go home soon, but the harsh winter prevented him from leaving my castle. I had begrudgingly given him shelter until the weather as safe enough for their travels. And I had admonished him for foolishly embarking on a long journey without enough supplies. What if he ran short? What if he had been attacked by thieves? He would surely be dead!  
  
Every morning when I wake up, it is my routine to feed our baby, who I still haven't named. The people are anxious about her name, and I had assured them that I would inform them in due time. But in reality, I couldn't decide on a name yet.  
  
One morning when I was feeding my baby in the veranda, Bill was in the courtyard for a walk. He had spotted me, and he wasted no time approaching me. I wish he hadn't.  
  
"Good morning," he said as he knelt beside me to watch me feed our baby.  
  
"Good morning," I replied.  
  
"Our baby is so beautiful. So perfect."  
  
"I know." For once, I found myself agreeing with him. "She's beautiful."  
  
"Indeed. And smart and charming. And I look forward to teaching her art, science and philosophy. And I want only the bravest knight or the noblest prince to marry her."  
  
I sighed, annoyed. I was irked at how Bill imagined himself in our daughter's life when I already told him I wanted a divorce.  
  
"Bill, I do not know if you are arrogant or simply stupid, but I already made it clear that I want a divorce. Marriage is not for us."  
  
"How can you say that, Hillary?" he said. "We are happy. We have problems, but there is nothing that we cannot conquer. Together," he pleaded with me. I could feel his desperation seeping into my skin.  
  
"No, we aren't," I said bitterly. "Otherwise, you wouldn't want me dead."  
  
"What?! What are you talking about?"  
  
I've had it with his ignorance. I stood up and snatched our baby away. "I heard you and Lady Claire plot my murder."

"I had nothing to do with it!" he insisted. "If that was your reason for divorce, then you should know that I banished her for it!"

"But..."  
  
"Lady Claire is jealous of you, because she thought I was with you every night, because I wasn't coming to her! The truth is, I wanted to come to you, but I couldn't because it was unfair to Claire!"  
  
"But you love her!" I said weakly, "Why don't you sleep with her!"  
  
I angrily marched away from Bill, angry at myself for being fragile.  
  
As I ran away, I said to him, "the divorce is final, Bill. Go home. There is nothing you can do to convince me otherwise."

If only I didn't see Bill sobbing on the floor, this would have been a lot easier for me. My heart was crushed to see him weep like that, but I shouldn't fall for crodocile tears.

There is no way he would choose Claire over me. Not ever.

xxx

_ Bill _

Dearest Hillary,  
  
You're right. I need to get away from you. I should have known that you deserve a better man than me. I was delusional to think that I can make feel even an ounce of happiness that you always give me.  
  
I'll make it quick and easy. No need for a divorce. I'll be gone before you know it. You will not see me ever again, and I will not bother you and your children. You are better off without me, Hillary. I hope you will find a better man to love and cherish you.  
  
But please know that I love you so much, even when you thought I didn't, even when it doesn't matter anyway because you don't love me back. My life is so much brighter because of you. You are the sun that shines on my days and the star that illuminates my night. My world is revolving around you, and if you go, then it means that my life reaches its eternal darkness, darkness that I can never ever escape from.

Be well, my love. With this farewell message, I will end my life, because there is nothing else for me to live for. My life effectively ended when you said goodbye.

I love you always Hillary.  Even in death.

Bill

xxx

_ Hillary _

I had ordered the guards to search for Bill as soon as I read his letter which he slipped under the door of my bedchamber. My blood churned. I was panicked and annoyed at him. Indeed, he had a flair for the dramatic, but I hope what he wrote was just a rouse.  
  
What a stupid man, I thought. Throwing away his life...just for...me...  
  
I felt a lump in my throat that I couldn't swallow. My chest twinged painfully.  
  
My annoyance turned into desperation. As I looked for him in every room in the castle, I was inching closer and closer to crying.  
  
Thankfully, one of my men found him at the topmost room of the highest tower. I told them that I would go alone, but they should stand guard at the foot of the stairs. The obeyed my command, and so, I raced towards the top before it was too late.  
  
When I arrived, I was just on time. I found Bill, sobbing, with a dagger in his hand, about to slit his wrists. I screamed his name, and that was enough to momentarily distract him. I was able to approach him, and I greeted him with the most painful slap. The sound of my hand against his face cracked loudly at the top of the tower.  
  
"What are you doing, Bill?!" I said angrily. "Have you gone mad?!"  
  
"You said you don't want me anymore," he said meekly. "So here I am"-  
  
I cut him off with another slap.  
  
"I want you Hillary," he said. "I want you!"  
  
"That doesn't give you the right to kill yourself!" I admonished. "I wanted-" I betrayed my feelings to him, but I was thankful that I was able to stop myself. "You don't have to do this!"  
  
"You don't understand, Hillary," Bill fell into his knees and sobbed at my feet. "I love you. I love the air you breathe and the ground you walk on. I love everything that is you. Every inch of your skin, every curve and every crevice. And now, our daughter too. You don't know what I feel Hillary!"  
  
I stood there, stunned. I had never seen him in a fit of emotions. Had...had he really felt that for me? I...I...  
  
I let him sob in my feet. He seemed to have calmed down a bit. Once he stopped, I felt him stir beneath me. He wasn't crying anymore. He was kissing my feet, like I was his master and he was my lowly servant. A king! My servant! I didn't know what to feel, but I was overwhelmed by it.  
  
His kisses became more urgent and passionate, and he got up to my ankle, where he pulled my dress upward. I let him pull my undergarment down, exposing my sex. He took his time relishing my leg, and I squirmed a little, feeling my arousal. He was biting and sucking my skin, and his lips were travelling upwards. Now he was on my thigh, and my entrance was clenching to welcome him.  
  
His lips were as good as I remembered. He had always been good at pleasuring me, and today was no exception. I heard myself purr. I inched myself towards the wall where I could lean as he devoured me alive. I let a moan escape from my lips as I reveled in the most amazing sensation.  
  
Shoving my skirt up, Bill closed in on my hard nub and flicked it with his tongue. I didn't know whether it was due to me just giving birth or the lack of sex, but I was more sensitive than I remembered. I thrusted my hips to meet his tongue, and I couldn't get enough of it. I wanted more. So much more.

I wanted him so badly, more then he wanted me.  
  
He seemed to know what I wanted because he paid attention to my wet slit too. He alternated between nub and my slit, and it felt so, so good. My fingers were tangled in his hair, urging him to give me more.  
  
When Bill flicked his tongue against my nub incessantly, I felt myself clench. My body shook as I felt pleasure surge in every vein of my body. As I came back to myself, Bill stood back up, running his hand to wipe my essence off his mouth. He looked dazed, but a lot happier than when I found him.  
  
He sunk into my arms, his lips against my temple, my cheek, and then my lips. I opened them wordlessly, my entire body loving the warmth that he gave  
  
"Thank you," I whispered to his ear.  
  
"I better be going" he said. "I am sorry that I had worried you. I think I should leave in the morning. I hope you don't mind lending me a horse or two."  
  
I did not stop him from leaving the tower, but I wanted to do something from him walking away from me, but my feet were rooted on the floor.  
  
"I know this is your residence," he said before walking away, his voice desperate, "but in my bedchamber, you are a welcome guest."  
  
As we walked away, I felt my heart clench again.

I have never been so wrong in my life.

xxx  
  
_Bill_

After my failed suicide attempt, I immediately washed my body. I was praying to God and calling to all the saints to please make her come to me. I wanted my wife back. I wanted the love of my life back. She meant to me more than life itself. God please, make her come to me!  
  
She did not appear at supper, and I had assumed she was just feeding our child. And so I retired early, so that I would be there if ever she arrived.  
  
She did not come soon, and I thought she had decided against it, so I forced myself to sleep. But I couldn't. So I sent for a maid to fetch me tea with honey.  
  
To my surprise, it wasn't the maid with the tea who knocked on the door. It was Hillary, wearing a lace nightgown that revealed her beautiful bosom. I was stuck between disbelief and my astonishment over her beauty. But when I was finally coming to my sense, I dived right in and kissed her like her like there was no tomorrow.  
  
I carried her in my arms and I felt her legs wrap around my hips, humping against my already erect cock. I laid her on to the bed gently and I hovered above her, but she violently flipped us so she was above me. I was in no mood to complain, as I was having a full view of her gorgeous body. I felt triumphant when Hillary sunk unto me, as if I found home. Her gasp was enough to tell me that she was feeling the pleasure, and by Jove, I shall give her all the pleasure in the world!

She moaned at each thrust, and I whimpered. I flicked her nub and guided her as she raised and lowered herself unto me. I have never been this aroused. And by her actions, it was the same for her too. Our movements were frantic, and we needed the release real soon.  
  
Not long after, the pressure building inside us exploded simultaneously, and all we saw were stars. She had abandoned her frantic pace and I basked in the sight of her pinching her nipples while she rode out her climax. I, on the other hand, had never came this hard.  
  
When we regained our breathing, she rolled on to my side while I wrapped my arm around her lovingly.  
  
"I love you," I said, and she had never smiled so sweetly.

"I know that now," she replied.

"I am glad," I said. "Do you love me?"

She looked at me with wanton desire before she kissed my lips.

"Unequivocally," she said.

xxx

_ Hillary _

Staying at my husband's bedchambers without telling anyone was not exactly a good idea, because we were woken up by a horrified scream from one of my maids. She was supposed to bring Bill his hot water in the morning. The poor maid had caught us both naked in bed, and her face was beet red.  
  
Bill chuckled at the fiasco. I had to admit, I was a little amused too, but I shrouded our bodies with the covers of his bed. I had ordered the maid to do her business and leave us immediately.

"Good morning, my sunshine," Bill kissed me.

"Good morning too," I said. "Is it day already? I felt I didn't get enough sleep."  
  
Bill let out a mischievous smile. "Of course you didn't."  
  
I rolled my eyes at his brash humor, pretending that I wasn't amused. But there was no pretense in my moans when we were in the tub and he slipped inside me again, hitting the spot that made me sigh each and every time.  
  
I left his bedchambers to change and to feed our baby. Soon after, he followed me so that he could watch us.

"Such a previous little angel" he admired our child who was sucking milk our of my breast. "Have you decided on her name yet?"  
  
I shook my head. "No. Maybe we can decide on that together?"  
  
His eyes lit up and said, "Yes!"  
  
We had decided to call her Chelsea Victoria Margaret Eleanor. It seemed that our child liked it too because she had become a bundle of joy ever since we called her Chelsea.  
  
Following our reconciliation, I was excited to resume my conjugal life with Bill. However, there was the issue of my alliance with my Uncle. Now that we are no longer foes, I had to work out on my withdrawal plan. Bill suggested a passive approach where I simply would not fight anymore, and my troops would simply leave my Uncle's forces to themselves.  
  
However, an idea sprung into my head. I told Bill about it, and he thought that it might work. But in order to pull this off, we needed the utmost secrecy.  
  
And it involved pushing through with our divorce.

xxx  
  
_Bill_

Winter was over, and so was the winter truce. Spring was in full bloom so the war between us and Howard's men had resumed.  
  
Hillary's plan was a simple one. She and I will pursue divorce to prove her allegiance to Howard. We will be present when the first swords are drawn. I will pretend to have no knowledge of her betrayal and her men will be with Howard's. Once the battle commences, her men will sow confusion and attack Howard's forces. My men will then aid her men until his army is decimated.  
  
Our rouse to pursue our divorce was necessary, but it killed me not to see her wedding ring in her finger. But no matter. She will wear it again once Howard is gone and we have married again.  
  
My general, David, led the troops towards the battlefield. I decided to see the entire battle on a shelter the men had built for that purpose. It was situated on top of the hill overseeing the fields. My general had advised me against leading the troops myself, as Howard’s men would certainly take an aim on me.  
  
On the other side of the hill, I saw another shelter. I saw the figures of my wife and Howard emerge on the shelter. Howard saw me and gave a threatening look. Hillary, on the other hand, looked apprehensive. How I wish I could run over there and kiss her fears away. But alas. She had to do this on her own.  
  
My eyes focused on the battlefield. The two forces met at the battlefield below us. My best men were on the field, so are Hillary’s. I could see a small group of men, our generals, approaching the middle of a field to discuss the terms of the battle.  
  
After five agonizing minutes, our generals had dispersed, and the battle commenced. At first, I saw Hillary’s men charging towards my men alongside Howard’s. But once the two opposing forces clashed, the betrayal began. Hillary’s men, making use of the confusion in a battle, were attacking Howard’s forces. Howard’s men were, as expected, dumbfounded. It seemed like it was working.  
One the other side of the hill, I saw a raging Howard. He was red with fury. My natural instinct was to run over to the other side and shield my wife from the impending rage of her uncle. But my men restrained me. I had to let Hillary do this, as much as I wanted to protect her.  
  
Suddenly, something amazing happened. It the midst of Howard’s rages, when he was about to take aim ay my wife, I saw her swiftly pull a dagger underneath her skirt and plunged it in Howard’s chest. There was a spray of blood all over, even staining her dress and her skin. Howard’s men were quick to turn to Hillary, but her lieutenants were quicker. They were able to overpower Howard's men. When Howard has fallen, I saw Hillary took her Uncle's sword and brandish it in front of the battlefield. It took a while before the men in the field realize what had just happened, and my men and Hillary's rejoiced once they say her victorious over Howard. And the effect was nothing short of amazing. Our men suddenly gained this ferociousness they didn't have earlier, and they killed Howard's men left and right until everyone was destroyed. The last remaining men from Howard's ranks announced their retreat, and with that, victory was ours.  
  
Once the coast was clear, I raced towards the other side of the hill to meet my wife. She was waiting for me there with open arms, and I melted in her embrace. I have never been so proud of her. Hillary had singlehandedly reclaimed her Father's domains and restored his lost position. No woman has ever done that before.  
  
"Oh Hillary," I said, "I am so proud of you, Darlin'."

Victories are never without sacrifice. In this case, it was her brother Hugh who had to be the sacrificial lamb. He was stabbed by one of Howard's men in the battlefield. Hillary was devastated when she learned of his death. That night, we organized a simple funeral for him and for all of our dead before we would bury them, but Hugh's remains would be carried back to the castle for a royal funeral.  
  
Queen Dorothy was beyond inconsolable when she saw her son's body. King Hugh would have been the same, if he wasn't too weak to get out of his bed. Hillary's parents were mourning for the loss of their son and heir but were incredibly proud of the achievements of their daughter.  
  
Days after the younger Hugh's funeral, there was a consensus made by the New York nobles. They were considering overturning the law barring women from ascending the throne of New York and support Hillary to become the Crown Princess, provided that if she ever intended to marry me again, I would not interfere with her reign. They had seen her capabilities and they though she would do well ruling over New York. As for me, I had no issues leaving my wife's affairs alone. As her husband, I know very well not to speak for my wife. She is her own person.  
  
As the celebrations commence in New York, I began my journey back to Arkansas. I should be preparing for my own coronation as King. Hillary held my hand and kissed me on the cheek. She said she would be expecting my marriage proposal soon. And so, I knelt before her and presented her the sword of the King of Arkansas. She became teary eyed, and she could not utter a single word. She pulled me up and kissed me passionately in the lips while whispering, "Yes, I'll be your Queen Consort." I promised her that when I get back, she would be my wife again, and she would be crowned alongside me in Arkansas.  
  
Until then, I will count the days and prepare for the next chapter of our lives. Looking back, I have never thought our marriage will take this splendid turn. But I do not regret it. How can I? With Hillary, there is never a dull moment.  
I just hope like in those stories we tell children, we will live happily ever after.


End file.
